The Boy in my Band (Larry)

Tour⚠️

Today is our first day of our new tour and I haven't been feeling so well. I open my bag that I brought onto the tour bus with us to look for my medication and I can't find it. I quickly dump everything out of my bag and notice it's not here.

"AHHHHHH NOOOO" I scream causing Zayn to come over to me

"What's wrong bud" Zayn says

"Nothing I just forgot something important back at the house" I say

"Oh well I hope it wasn't to important" Zayn says

"Haha yeah" I say with a fake laugh

I put everything back in my bag and try to forget about my medication. All I do is tell myself that I'll be okay and nothing will happen. An hour later we make it to our stadium and walk in. When we walk in we immediately see Lou our hairstylist.

"Hey boys" Lou says

"Hello Love" Harry says

"Hey" Zayn and Niall say

"Liam and I just give her a hug

We sit down in the dressing room when I get a thought. I start to internally panic because if the thoughts are coming back then other things will eventually come back too. Lou finishes our hair and we get dressed into our stage outfits and head on stage. Immediately as we get on stage the crowed gets louder and louder. Harry screams into the microphone and we start singing our setlist. During the show I find it hard to keep my eyes off of Harry. I try not to make it obvious but than Harry comes over and wraps his arm around me while he's singing his part. He looks at me and our eyes lock. He ends up smirking at me and I feel my face go red. At this point I have zoned out all the crowds noise and am just focusing on Harry singing. Sometimes I like to think he's singing to me.

*3 hours later*

We head back onto our tour bus and I decide to go lay down in my bunk. I close the curtain and just lay there with my thoughts. It feels like they are taking over my body again. I can't help but let it get to me that Harry doesn't like me and will never like me because he's straight. He's not into guys. He's not into me especially. I get up and grab my plastic razor and head to the bathroom. I lock the door and break my razor against the side of the bathroom sink. I take the broken razor blade and roll up my left sleeve. I run the blade against my arm making 7 cuts. I bite down on my lip with each cut trying not to let the whimpers release from my mouth. After I finish I watch the blood run down my arm. I don't even bother washing my arm. I just pull my sleeve back down and head back to my bunk. I hide the blade under my mattress and head out to the table where Harry is making dinner, Zayn's on his phone, and Allan and Niall are playing videos games. I sit down on the stool in the kitchen and grab some chips to eat. I munch on a few before Harry comes over and grabs them from me.

"You can't eat these now" Harry says

"Why not" I say and look up at him

"I'm making everyone food and you'll spoil your appetite" Harry says

"Fine" I say and playful roll my eyes at him

Harry smirks at me and laughs