HARMONY IN BLOOM

Chapter -01

The worst day ever! I can't believe it.

I am curled up in my bed wondering where did I go wrong. How could I got wrong? I was literally on the stage like six hours ago. I was looking appreciatively at the crowd beaming with cheers and shouts of my name. Was my day not bad enough already?

Why did the doctor choose my precious time after one of the most successful concerts of mine to tell me my test reports?

Why did he have to tell me I have alopecia?

"Ugh!" I groan as I pull the blanket over my head.

I had been so happy...

Well, should I tell Erin? What would she think? Probably that I am a clown and nothing else. I groan yet again as I feel the tears stinging my eyes for the first time today.

I cry for what seems like an hour or so. Then I get out of bed and go to the kitchen for a glass of water. I got there only to find Erin sleeping with her head on her arms folded on the kitchen slap in front of her laptop.

I can't think anymore.

I can't do this to her. She's too sweet. She's my best manager and my best friend. I cannot bear to tell her about my alopecia at all. Now I'm crying again.

I run back to my room and hide under my blanket and cry. Like really sob. I realize how messed up this is. What this could do to my career, my life, my real self.

••••

I groan and reach out to silence my alarm. I silence my alarm, it means that it's seven in the morning.

I smell waffles.

I smile and stretch out on my bed when it all starts to sink in. I am gonna to have to tell Erin today. About my alopecia. How am I gonna perform anyways? With a wig on?

That thought made me laugh. And then I cry. Again. Damn these emotions.

I dry my eyes quickly and go out to the kitchen.

"Morning glows, love flows" Erin says as I take a seat.

"Morning"

"So, have your breakfast and then I'll tell you your schedule for today. I was up till late last night to plan it out." She says as she sets the plate in front of me. Two waffles with caramel sauce on top and some chicken on the side. Yum!

"Yeah, I saw you when I came here to drink water. You were asleep by that time. You looked so peaceful, I didn't wake you up."

"Thank you I guess. By the way. I know you like waffles with chicken for breakfast. What a weird combination it is anyways. Who eats this stuff. Anyways, so I thought maybe I should make that for you. How are they?"

"Oh absolutely delicious and for your information, this is the best combo one could ever eat!"

I finish up and take my plate to the sink and start washing it. And then I finally after a long time I finally bring up the courage to think. I should tell her now should I not? Yes I should. I debated going bank to bed. But I really need to do this. It's my career on the line. I need to tell her about my alopecia. She needs to know as my manager and my friend. And how long will I be able to even hide it from her? Of course she would notice hair fall. Maybe I'll be able to hide my hair. But what about my eyebrows? Eyelashes? Matter-of-fact.

I finally stop debating to myself and start walking to the kitchen slab where she's seated working on her laptop.

"Hey, Erin." I say. "Yeah. What's up?"
When she looks up she says big eyed, "Are you okay? You look like you're about to puke."

"Actually, I am not okay. I just.... It's that.... Ugh! How do I do this."

"Is there something troubling you?"

"Troubling me? I don't know. Well, Erin I want you to listen to me very carefully. Promise me you won't get mad. What I'm going to tell might effect our lives greatly."

"Umm... Okay... I guess? What's the drill?" She says it so lightly. She definitely thinks I'm weird.

"So yesterday before our concert, you remember I had an appointment with Dr. Locke?"

"Um yeah. What about it?"

"I was having severe hair fall for the past week. So I went for the appointment. And after the concert, like right after it, he called me to inform me of it. And apparently I have alopecia" I say the last word with spite. She gasps.

I don't know why but I am not sure of what to think of her expression. She hates me. Oh my god. She definitely hates me. I stiffen at the thought of her leaving me. I shouldn't have told her. Ugh! Why did I? She must really think that I am a clown.

She must notice my change in composure because she panics  and says, "Oh my god! Are you alright?" I don't know what to say.

I just nod. I don't think I am okay. Not at all. I feel the tears well up in my eyes. My throat is burning. I feel so overwhelmed by a rush of emotions.

Fear, sadness, pity, anger.

"Erin I don't know what to do. What if I lose all my hair? I'm so scared. I just.." I cry harder that I ever have.

Erin puts both her hands on my shoulders and makes me face her. "Hey, hey, hey, listen to me." She says as she pulls me in for a hug. "We'll figure this out together, okay? Sienna, you're not alone in this. And your talent and strength go way beyond your hair." I cry so hard that I'm hardly able to get out the words 'thank you'.

••••

After what seemed like an half an hour of both of us crying, I smiled. Since the moment the doctor called I had not smiled. Not even when Erin was congratulating me. I sniffed, feeling a glimmer of hope amidst the uncertainty. "Thank you, Erin. I don't know what I'd do without you."

She smiled softly and hugged me again, this time her embrace offering me solace and reassurance. "You don't have to know. More like you'll never have to find out. I've always got you back." She says pushing me at an arm's length. "Me too. Thank you so much Erin." She just smiles.

But that smile gives me an assurance that maybe it was right to tell her. She's my best friend after all. She has got my back and I have got her's. What was I scared of? She would never think of me like a clown? And I need to believe in her. I need to find everything she says as important. And I need to make a note to never hurt her too.

Am I a fool or what?

Maybe.

______