Take a shot of holy water

Ill never go away

The morning sunlight cast a golden haze over Remus' freckled body. He was turned away from Sirius, caught in the throes of slumber. His face was so peaceful that Sirius wanted to catalogue every inch of it to remember on days that he was feeling bad. The mere memory of it would be enough to make him outrageously happy, like his heart was overflowing with the emotion.

He reached a hand out and tumbled it through Remus' curls, burning with the light that had filtered in. They were soft to the touch, and Sirius handled them with newfound gentleness. Nothing like the gripping passion of the night, where anything less than bruising desire didn't feel like enough. It was such a wonderful thing, to be granted both types of affection.

Remus was cast in the most marvelous sunlit shades; they suited the natural warmth in his skin like a glove. He looked beautiful under any lighting, but if Sirius were Michelangelo, painting him into a deity, he would have painted him like this.

Remus stirred as Sirius brushed a thumb behind one of his ears, and he sank further into his comfort. Sirius closed his eyes in gentle peace. He'd wanted this to happen more than anything, but never in a million years would he have anticipated it being so perfect in every way.

Mary had always talked to him about 'making love' to Emmeline, and he'd teased her mercilessly. Just call it fucking, or at the very least sex , he would say, rolling his eyes and hiding his burning face in his hands, feeling waves of secondhand embarrassment. She was never embarrassed though. She took pride in making love to Emmeline, something that went deeper than their bodies, to the cores of their very souls.

Sirius usually liked to keep it at the body level, even when he'd been with Benjy in what they called a 'relationship', but was really a one sided thing that Sirius felt awful about if he thought about it too much. That extra connection, the one Mary wouldn't stop talking about once she got started... Sirius hadn't believed her. He'd never felt that, nor wanted to.

With Remus, there was a moment of blinding clarity, and he understood everything Mary had ever said. He didn't want to fuck Remus, or merely have sex with him. He wanted to make love to him. And he had.

And now, in the early hours of the morning, with only the sun for company, Remus hadn't run away. He was still there, settling deeper into the bed like it was where he belonged. He was a priest, but he wasn't, not right then. Right then, all he needed to be was someone Sirius could pour his heart into until it overflowed.

"What are you thinking?" Remus asked, voice groggy and more heavily accented with sleep. Sirius' hand stilled in his hair as he opened his eyes slowly. Remus was still facing away from him, but Sirius just liked looking at him so much that he didn't care.

He resumed running his hand through Remus' hair. Sirius didn't know what he was thinking. He was thinking too much, and though there was nary a bad thought to be had, he was shy to say it all aloud. The words in his heart were ones he'd never spoken to anyone ... and if he had, well, he now realized he hadn't really meant them.

Sirius traced from the crown of Remus' head down to the small of his back. He didn't go down further, but god did he want to.

Remus turned over slowly, looking Sirius in the eye with a sentimental sort of sparkle. His eyes were so interesting up close. From afar, they looked to be your run of the mill brown eyes, nothing so unique or arresting as Sirius' light gray, bordering on silver. But up close, he could see that Remus' pupils were rimmed by a ring of green that blended seamlessly into the brown outer ring. He wasn't sure if it was some form of heterochromia, or just what hazel looked like up close, but whatever it was was so mesmerizing that Sirius forgot his own name.

He'd thought Remus couldn't look better than he had that night at the church, standing over him and asking him to kneel, moonlight shining on the stained glass behind him, but now he knew that he was wrong. This Remus, caught in the haze of morning and so comfortable, like the embodiment of the woolen jumpers he was partial to, was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.