For Granted: Regretful Childhood Friend

Chapter 5 | ✓

I am lying in bed after experiencing a strange and sad day. Staring at the ceiling, I couldn't understand how Chase could have treated me so poorly. How could he hurt me so much without a second thought? I've been here for a while now, feeling rejected and humiliated. My best friend has treated me badly, but why? What was the reason? After that kiss, how could he do this?How could he act like my feelings didn't matter? I'm now questioning how genuine his feelings really are.

It's hard to believe he could disregard my emotions like this. Today was truly upsetting. One moment I'm being kissed, and the next, I'm left feeling like I'm not really his girlfriend. So romantic, right?

I was really used to having Chase around. I thought he was a bit mine, or at least that's how I felt. Now I realize it was never that way. His presence felt like a steady part of my life. For a long time, he was just a friend I played with. Then he became a really good friend. Before I knew it, he was someone very important to me. Now, in my heart, he's the boy I've wanted and loved deeply.But what was I to him? So important that he could turn me down in front of some girl from university? These thoughts made me close my eyes in pain. Am I overreacting? I don't think so.

There's also the issue of our family. Our parents were friends, so we always had big holiday gatherings together, and it was truly wonderful. But now... Chase, you've made me feel so insignificant. Did you even notice that?

He tried to call me three times after class, but I just ignored him. I left early and went straight home to avoid running into him again. He knew what he had done, and it was clear I wasn't ready for any more talks.

I've received some messages but haven't opened them. If he thinks everything can go back to how it was, he's very mistaken. As I think about this, my phone rings, and I see it's him calling again. I decide to send a quick text, not wanting him to show up at my dorm like last time.

"Please, stop calling. I won't answer. If you come here, I'll call the police. I'm serious."

I hit send and silenced my phone. Feeling unwell in bed, I get up to take a bath and have dinner. I refuse to starve myself for someone so ungrateful.

As I finish this thought, I start my night routine, not realizing the many messages that were coming in on my phone.

- The Next Day -

I'm all set to head to class. Amanda told me that Chase somehow got her number and called her three times last night. The first call was him asking her to give the phone to me, but she said no. The second time, he pleaded, "Please, I really need you to pass the phone to her," and she hung up without answering. The last call was him begging, "I'm begging you, Amanda, for everything that's holy, pass the phone to her. She can't stay mad at me!" Amanda told me she let him have it with some strong words about a guy who could let a friend down like that.

He tried to say he knew he messed up, but she was tired of his calls and cut him off in the middle of his explanation. So, that was the news I got at 7 a.m. It didn't make me happy at all. The 72 messages and 45 missed calls from Chase didn't help either. I grab my purse and other things I need for the day, leave my dorm, and soon I'm outside, on my way to campus.

Soon, I notice a freshman approaching me with a bouquet in hand. He had been sitting nearby, and now he is looking at me seriously but I don't know him and never talked to him before.

"Miss, good morning," he says raising, and I pause to listen. He explains that Chase is currently in training and can't be here. He goes on to say that Chase feels terrible for his earlier behavior, that he respects me, and wants to clarify that I am indeed his girlfriend. He assures me that he has dealt with the other girl and promises it won't happen again. He wishes I would respond to him.

"Okay, fine!" I cut him off, raising my hand to signal him to stop. "I get it. It's not your fault, but I really don't care. Thanks, though." He then insists that Chase sent me the flowers as a sign of respect and love, offering me a vibrant bouquet of tulips. "I don't want it. Sorry," I reply, trying to walk around him. "But miss, I don't know what to do with them!" he pleads. Arghh!

I return to my dorm feeling frustrated and angrier than before. I carelessly toss the flowers inside and head back out, finally making it to my first class. In my second class of the day, I go over my notes when I see someone sitting next to me. I glance up to see Chase, holding two cups of pricey coffee and looking regretful and pitiful.

He attempts a shy smile, but I just stare at him blankly and turn back to my notes. "Babe... Look," he begins. "Don't. I'm busy. I don't want to hear you," I reply without looking up. "I'm sorry..." he says. "I already told you. Don't," I respond. 

At that moment, the professor walks into the room and begins the class. Although Chase isn't enrolled in this class, he stays until it ends, and I can sense him watching me the entire time. I choose to ignore him and focus on what the professor is saying.

When the class concludes, I stand up, and Chase quickly comes over to walk with me, waiting for me to gather my belongings. He follows closely as I head toward the door. "Babe, please..." he says, grabbing my arm. "Wait, please..." I pull away from his grip and face him. "Don't call me that anymore. Just say what you need to say," I reply firmly. He looks at me with a sad expression and begins to explain, 

"I was really wrong yesterday. I'm truly sorry. I owe you an explanation, and I shouldn't have acted that way. You're my best friend, and I didn't treat you with the respect you deserve. Please forgive me." I take a moment to consider his words before responding. 

"I won't hold a grudge, but I need you to understand that I'm not interested in pursuing anything with you anymore. You showed me where your loyalties lie, and it wasn't with me. I can't accept being treated like that. I valued our friendship, but it seems you didn't feel the same way. I can't date someone who can switch from affection to disrespect so quickly." I pause, and he looks at me, eager to respond.

"Hold on! Please, don't do this. It's not what you think. Don't say those things... I promise I'll fix this. I really like you, and I want you to be my girlfriend. I want it more than anything. Let's go to my place so we can talk and sort this out together. I'll make it right, I promise," As I continue looking at him blankly, he exclaims. "Erin! I swear it!"

"Chase, I'm not here to wait for another girl like Ashley to show up while you play the hero. You can help someone without getting involved in a messy situation that affects someone you swear is important to you, that person being me. But, hey, I forgot, I guess I'm not your girlfriend, am I?" He looks shocked and his face turns bright red as he processes my words. It's clear he realizes this isn't just a minor issue in our relationship. 

"I didn't mean it that way, shit. I swear I consider you my girlfriend! Erin is my girlfriend!" he yells, drawing attention from passing students. I feel embarrassed and annoyed as I tell him to stop. Everyone is looking!

"I'm going to my class. We can talk later," I say, turning to leave, looking down embarrassed but he starts to follow me. "Don't you dare come to my class again!"

"Erin, please... I really want to be with you. I'm begging you, I am sorry. Hell! I know I messed up, but I promise to be quiet. I just want to be close to you!" He follows me for a few steps, desperation in his voice.

"I told you no! Don't call me, don't text me, and don't send anyone else to talk to me. Goodbye!" I glance back at him as I say this and notice his eyes beginning to redden. I choose to ignore it and keep walking, aware that others are watching us with interest. The tension between us is thick, and I can feel the weight of their stares. I focus on putting distance between us, determined to move on despite his pleas.