PART FOURTEEN

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"Hmm, should I get a haircut?" Indigo twirled a lock of his hair. "NO!" Emma spat out the bite of food she was chewing, making both Indigo and I laugh a bit. "You want another trim?" I asked, passing Emma a napkin. He shook his head before replying, "No, I mean, like, I wanna chop it all off." "If you do, I'll cry," Emma had grabbed onto Indie's arm and was squeezing hard, whining, "Whyyy??"

"Umm, no reason, nevermind...," he looked to the side, for a second seeming like he was making a decision of how to answer. "Okayyy... oh yeah, so E, what'd your mom say about me coming over?" Emma turned to me, crumbs of food still on the side of her mouth. "She said it's fine, but you two have to stay downstairs." "Pfft, does your mom think Indie and I are gonna try to make out or something?" she giggled, before turning to him and making a kissy face. "Gross!" Indigo laughed, pushing her away. "OMG, we should totally plan a sleepover soon!" she suddenly gasped, pulling out her bright pink phone. "I could invite Syd and the others!" She kicked her feet under the table.

"I dunno how my mom will feel about that," I interrupted, though not because I was cutting her off, more like commenting in a conversation I wasn't really a part of. "True...," she looked up to the ceiling in thought, then turned back down to Indie, "What if you came over to my house then??" "Uhh, wouldn't it be weird for me to go to a sleepover with a bunch of girls?" he inquired to her after taking a bite of his food. She paused for a moment with a blank face. "I keep forgetting you're a dude."

"Really? It's just his hair though," I gazed at him, "Mmm, actually, yeah, I could see it," I remarked, just to tease him. "Wha-??" He looked like he was about to protest, when he stopped and just looked down at his food, a bit of blush coming over his face. "I think the bell's about to ring, want me to throw away your guys' stuff?" I abruptly stood. They handed me their trays and went back to talking about their plans.

The next day seemed to have started like normal; normal being me waking up a few minutes past my alarm and Indigo already downstairs talking with Camila or rummaging through his side of my closet, because 'his outfit wasn't working'. I got ready quickly, but when I headed downstairs, Indigo wasn't at the table or in the living room. I didn't really think anything of it and just made myself some cereal. A few minutes went by, when Camila's door swung open and I heard her saying, "Come on, you look good, go, go!" Slowly, Indigo walked out. His hair was half up, with two strips of the front out like long bangs, and he was wearing a loose white shirt tucked into skinny jeans that I didn't even know he owned. He had a couple of jangling bracelets and a necklace with a flower charm on.

"What's this?" I scanned over his clothes. "Isn't he pretty?" Camila hummed, a smug smile of pride on her face. "Pfft, sure," I snickered, humoring her. "...Really?" Indigo meekly asked, walking over and sitting down at the table. "It's a little girly, but, I mean, it works," I remarked, with a full mouth. "Should I dress like this more?" he continued to prod. "What, like a girl?" I looked up at him. "Well-," he hesitated, before Camila chimed in with, "Is that what you like?" "What I like? What do you mean?" I had put down my spoon, genuinely confused.

"Do you like him better as a girl?" She spoke with a smile, though asking such a weighted question. I didn't respond for a while, just considering the implication of that. If I said yes, did that mean I would date him in the case that he was a girl? If I said no, did that mean my feelings for him really wouldn't change if he were a girl? That sounded more right. I'd like him just as much. "No," I uttered, still lost in thought. "Man... so I did all this for nothing?" Camila sighed, walking back to her room.

I glanced up at Indigo, and he had a horrible expression of anger and sadness at the same time. "Indie?" I spoke softly, "What's wrong?" "Why? Why wouldn't you like me as a girl?" His voice was shaky and low. "Indigo, I would," I had a double-take, "I mean- I'd still think of you the same." "Then why don't you wanna be with me?!" I could hear the frustration in his voice building, "If it's not because I'm a boy, then do you really just not love me?!" "Love?" "Love!" His voice rose. "I love you, E, and not as a brother, or as a friend, I just love you." "How do you know that??" For some reason, I was getting riled up too.

"Because! I- I- well, I don't know, I just do!" His face was getting red, just like it always did when he was about to cry. I felt bad for him, I hated seeing him this way, so a part of me gave in, "Indigo... what would you want to happen, if... if I said I do too?" He paused, huffing. "I'd-," he crossed his arms and looked away from me, "I'd wanna be like Emma and her boyfriend." "She has a boyfriend?" "Yeah, he's in high school, but that's not the point! She's always telling me about how they- they hold hands all the time... and kiss... and that they go on dates," he went on, fidgeting uncomfortably with the bracelet on his wrist.

I was blushing like crazy across from him, though he wouldn't know because he was avoiding eye contact as best as possible. "I wanna be your boyfriend..." he finished his rant. "You what?" A loud voice came from behind us. "Dad-," I scrambled to my feet, my brain already whirling for some kind of explanation to pull out of my ass, "He's- he's joking!" -Was the best I could come up with. "Wh- wha—"," Indigo stammered from his seat. "Joking? It didn't sound like he was joking," my dad's voice was stern, but, in the moment, it just felt like anger. It must have been the same for Indigo, since he supported me as he stood up with, "Yeah, I was just messing around..." "What are you wearing?" Everything he said sounded like he was seething, and honestly I couldn't get the words out for an excuse if I wanted to.

"I'm getting your mother, we need to talk," he spun around to go back to their room. "But- we have school," Indigo blurted, stopping him. "...Then we'll talk after school. Call Camila, we'll head out now," he sighed, making his way to the front. The car ride was silent and when we were dropped off, our conversation seemed kind of pointless to continue. "Do you think he's mad?" Indigo muttered as we walked to the cafeteria to wait in before the bell. "Definitely...," I replied. We mostly stayed silent that morning.

Later, when we were heading to lunch together that day, a girl suddenly ran up to Indigo. "Are you new here?? I'm Kayla, but you can call me Kay!" Her voice was eccentric and loud, and she spoke really fast. "Uh- I've been here since the start of the year..." Indigo shyly replied, sliding a hand over his face to get his hair out of his eyes. "Really? I feel like I've never seen you before… and I know everyone! Anyways, you're really pretty, wanna be friends? What's your name?" She rapped out, before looking at me, "Oh, sorry, hi to you too!" I just nodded, still processing her sudden appearance.

"Thanks, but, um, I don't really know you," he hesitantly replied, and I felt his hand grab my sleeve as he started to try and walk away. She was about to keep talking, but Indigo rudely pushed past her. "Dang, that was harsh," I snickered, secretly thinking it was kind of cool. "Literally everybody has been coming up to me today, I'm sick of it," he sat down at our usual table, "All the girls were like, 'you're so pretty blah blah blah' and then, like, three guys asked for my 'social media', whatever that means." "Uhhh, Indigo, that means they're interested in you," I statically stood, shocked by what he was saying.

"Interested in what?" He reached down for his backpack and pulled out a plain gray lunchbox. "They probably thought you were a girl and wanted to ask you out," I laughed a little under my breath. "What?!" His face went bright red and he immediately looked down at himself, suddenly aware of his outfit again. He stood up, grabbing his backpack, "I'm changing into my gym clothes—!" I reached out and grabbed him, "You're fine! The day will be over in a few hours anyways." He complained a bit, but sat back down. "Hmm... I have a few friends that are looking for a gal, should I introduce you to them?" I teased, which got me a light shove from him and silent treatment for the rest of lunch.

When the end of the day finally came, we were both nervous waiting outside for my dad. The truck promptly arrived, and when I got in, I saw that my mom was in the passenger seat. The two of us buckled up, bracing for the tense conversation we'd been trying not to think about all day...

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