his new obsession

IX

nine months later

It was in December, in the clinic, when my water broke. Marc was in a business trip and wouldn't return for the next 4 days. I had an appointment for a natural birth in the hospital not a c section. Thankfully, the hospital was a 5 minute drive away from the clinic. Since i was pregnant, the clinic was closed for patients, i was only there to see the changes we were doing to the clinic. Amy, my secretary/nurse, an 50 year old sweet lady drove me to the hospital when my contractions begun. They hurt like a bitch. My parents and Marc's parents were informed about me going into labor though i didn't want anyone with me while giving birth, except marc since he's the father. We were having a boy, just like marc's intuition said. During my pregnancy, i wasn't supposed to be nursing marc, though he did on some occasions. I told my doctor, the one who i first told i was producing milk while i was a virgin, and she told me i can feed but not frequently (she thought i was pumpin g the milk out and giving them to babies in need) so that's what we did, he feed, but way less than before though we had sex almost daily.

I began my painful contractions and after 3 hours, i went into labor. Labor lasted for 4 whole hours of suffering before the pushing began. At first i felt hot pain all over my uterus and vagina. Then it felt like my vagina was tearing and ripping open. After a while, his head appeared followed by the whole body. The whole process, according to the doctor and nurses was very good and quick compared to other births. I had been exercising everyday and preparing for the moment of birth and i was thankful for every second because i don't think i could've handled any bit of more pain. The doctor informed me that i didn't need any stitches as the vagina didn't have any ripping and tearing and that it would recover normally. After the birth, they quickly cleaned my baby and gave him to me, pressed against my chest. I breastfed him for a while before i had to deliver the placenta. They took him and cleaned him after they cut the umbilical cord and sterilized it. My parents and parents in law came in after the baby was born congratulating me and wishing me a safe recovery before they left to the waiting room for me to rest. After a while from them leaving the room, a pretty nurse brought in my baby, that i hadn't named yet but, not before marc comes back. We were planning on either zade or sam. She told me he needed to be feed and instructed me on how to latch him properly . She left and i repeated what she told me to do. I had to place his mouth on the underside of the areola, which has only slightly widened,barely a centimeter  and then his chin had to be touching my breast. I latching his crying mouth and the feeling was not a single way similar to the feeling of Marc's mouth feeding. When Marc sucked, it was sexual and never serious, even when we weren't having sex. It was leading to sexy thoughts even though,physically, the feeling was so similar for both of them. However now, when my baby was sucking my nipple in his mouth, though he was latching the same and suckling the same, the feeling was solely maternal and protective, not in a single way sexual. He relieved the pressure building up in breasts as droplets of milk dribbled the side of his tiny mouth. One of his hands had rested on the top of my breast. He closed his eyes as he drifts off to sleep. He remains on my breast for a very long time because i didnt know if he fell asleep if was still feeding or he was supposed to stay there. I don't feel sad because Marc wasn't there to watch the birth, i only feel bad for him because he was so excited to watch the birth and welcome his son to the world. After a while, i gently unlatch him and tuck my breast back in my gown tho i place him back down on my chest as i fall asleep.
"Miss" the pretty nurse pokes her head through the door.
i blink "yea?"
" your son'a been crying for a bit, he needs to be fed"
" oh"
"i had to remove him off you when you fell asleep so no bad incident happens and put him in him specialized crib. I'll bring him to you shortly"
"okay"
she walks in a few moments later,rocking the crying baby gently She places in my arms gently before leaving and closing the door behind her. My breast is now leaking as his head on my chest. I straighten my back a bit, leaving him the way he's laying on my chest and guiding his head closer to my nipple, he latches, directly quieting and making gulping noises. my hand closes around the breast squeezing to produce more milk. He falls asleep quickly, the pretty nurse coming back in. "When you're done, you can press that button so i can help you put him there" she says gesturing to the plastic crib next to me. "Thank you i think he's done" i unlatch, gently lifting him and handing him to the nurse. The second he moves from my chest he starts crying "oops i think he wants to stay with his mama" she says "do u want to take him back or should we put him to sleep"
"no no he can stay with me"
"okay" she lays him back on my chest. He quiets down and then closes his eyes, scrunching his body against me, his size barely bigger than my head. my god he's so cute and fragile and small.
The next morning i wake up to a tiny baby no longer curling on me. The nurse tells me they feed him some of the bottled milk id pumped earlier, which i totally forgot, because they said i needed the rest. The rest of the day was filled with visits and feeding and attempting to walk. My in laws also informed me the Marc is currently in the plane. My parents gifted me a gold necklace with the carving of a boy dangling from it while my in laws gifted me a double banded ring with a tiny ruby in the middle.
The day after, Marc arrived. I was eating when he walked in, the baby in his arms. His eyes were slightly watery. I smile at the sight of Marcs huge frame gently carrying the tiny baby. i had changed to a black wool sweater and black wool wide legged pants. i planned to leave the hospital today despite if he arrived today or not.