Female Various x Male Reader one shots

important announcement

I've come to make an announcement
Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch ass motherfucker. He
pissed on my fucking wife. That's right, he took his
hedgehog fucking quilly dick out and he pissed on my
fucking wife and he said his dick was "this big" and I said
"that's disgusting"
So l'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com:
Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick, its the size
of this walnut except way smaller. And guess what?
Here's what my dong looks like. That's right baby, all
point, no quills, no pillows, look at that it looks like two
balls and a bong.
He fucked my wife so guess what? l'm gonna fuck the
Earth. That's right this is what you get, MY SUPER LASER
PISS. Except I'm not pissing on the Earth,I'm gonna go
higher, I'M PISSING ON THE MOON. HOW DO YOU LIKE
THAT OBAMA, I PISSED ON THE MOON YOU IDIOT!
You have twenty-three hours before the piss drop-el-ets
hit the fucking Earth, now get out of my fucking sight,
before I piss on you too.

Happy April Fools