The hearts desires; dangers of desire

Part 1-dangerous desires

Isra's pov

I had just ended my salah. I laid down on my pink praying mat and began my dhikr. My heart felt at ease and at peace. I was lost in the world of supplication. My room door was opened with force, I sat up hurriedly to see who that imbecile was. "Ukhti hurry, we're gonna be late for the party" oh, it was Jameel "I told you Jameel, I'm not going" Jameel instantly frowned at me as I adjusted my hijab.

"Cmon, it's just a silly mild party, no drugs. I promise" he says. "No Jameel, i wish you could see how dangerous going to parties at night could be" I said to him. He scoffed then said "maybe it's just you being too paranoid about little things, it's just a party stop over reacting"
"I'm not, I just don't wanna go" I shrugged.

"Yh well whatever, just borrow me five thousand please" he says, "what do you wanna buy with it?" I raised my right brow. "Uhm, just transport" he palmed the back of his neck. "You can drive Jameel, you're nineteen" I scoffed "I know you wanna buy them drugs" I said to him "what? Nahhh" he smirks "just at least borrow me please, I'll pay back next week" he insists. "Well no-" I didn't even get to finish before he grabbed my wallet and took off.

"Jameel!" I yelled as I struggled with my hijab to get up and chase after him. I could only hear his giggles as he ran off. I gave up and ran to the corridor. I spotted Jameel getting into a sports car. The car didn't have a roof top. So I could see the people inside it. There were so many half naked girls and guys smoking and vaping. I nodded a no repeatedly as he laughed and searched my wallet. He looked up at the corridor and showed me his middle finger. His friends and the girls laughed as they sped off.

"Ugh" I banged my fist on the wall. "My last money was in there" my eyes teared up in frustration as I marched to my father's room. I opened the door and I met him with a bottle of Guinness in his hands. Of course, he was one of them. I recited ayatul qursiy before knocking on his door. He turned around and looked at me. "Salam" I said and walked inside the room. "What do you want sweetie?" He lowered the bottle of ethanol.

I sighed and then gulped. "Baba, Jameel ran off with his drunk friends with all my money"
He instantly frowned. "Jameel? My son?" His frowned increased as I nodded. "Jameel is at the masjid Isra, how did he run off with your money?" He said "or is he able to be at two places at a time?" He sarcastically said and released a heavy laughter. Anger built up in me as I watched my drunk father mock me.

Argh, is anybody in this family normal?! I hissed lightly and walked away still with my dad laughing heavily.

I went into my room and banged my door.
I met my mom on my praying mat sobbing. I squinted my eyes to get a better view cus my room was kinda dark. "Mom?" I slowly walked up to her. She turned around and looked at me, immediately she did, she began wiping her cheeks. Oh right, she's the only normal one here.

"What's wrong?" I squatted to her level. "My baby, how are you doing? I haven't seen you today" she smiled and cupped my cheeks. "Oh, I just left my room to get something done and now I'm back" I smiled at her. "Why are you crying?" I asked her. She nodded a no "nothing you need to worry about" she smiled.

I frowned in suspicion "mom did dad hit you again?" I asked cus usually that's what he did. She remained silent for a second "I'm gonna give you room to sleep baby, see you tomorrow" she got up. I immediately blocked the way "tell me what's wrong mom!" I raised my voice a bit with tears piling up in my big eyes. She still remained silent. "Tell me mom!" Tears began rolling out of frustration.

I usually hated it when I cried when angry. I always felt so weak.

"Nothing Isra" she raised her voice a bit as she herself began crying. She wiped away her tears and tried to make her way out of my room, but I blocked her once more. "You're not leaving till you tell me why you were crying" I firmly said to her.

"Then I guess I'm spending a night here, it is quite peaceful in here anyways" she said with a smile on her face causing us both to giggle lightly.

"Isra, I'm gonna go check on kiara, she's been coming down with a cold" she said. I sighed "okay then, we'll speak tomorrow" I let her go.
She pecked me a good bye and made her way out.

I sat on my bed thinking of how I could save myself, kiara my younger sister, and my mom from this miserable life. My mom needs a job, but unfortunately she lost all of the ones she used to have thanks to my dad. So first I thought about how we could move out.

If we went to a relative's house, dad would most definitely find us. The other states in Nigeria were not in consideration because of how insecure they were. Even in Abuja, there were still crimes going on everywhere. Talk less of the other states. If we were to go back to my mom's place, Zaria, the bandits there would make a barbecue outta us.

I stroked my chin as I thought. Oh! What about Ammal? She and her mom were able to run out of the country. Maybe we could to. But, we don't even have passports, talk less of the money to move abroad.

Due to how broke my dad was, i had to stop school at year 9. Now I'm currently 15 and is meant to be in year 11, but I'm just a sorrowful hopeless girl who lives a miserable life. So a scholar ship wouldn't work for me.

Although, I could speak to my mom about it.. she and I could secretly work and save up. We don't even need to move out of the country. In Nigeria, once you're wealthy, no one can mess with you. If mom was open to a well paying job, then she would be able to shift dad out of our lives.

Well, that's tomorrow's activities. I'll make sure to text Ammal and ask her about details on how she and her mom left. I'll also begin to look for jobs. I promise to rescue us from this life. I do.

Jamla.

"What do you want from me?!" I yelled at Asghar as he pinned me to the floor choking my neck tightly. I struggled to breathe, but he cared less. "Just kill me already Asghar! Just do it! Khalaas! Enough of this nonsense!" I yelled at him. He giggled in a creepy manner "I would be thrilled to finally end you Jamla"

I sighed. I was sick and tired of being serene with dealing with him. He made my life arduous. He deserved no mercy. Although it was very perilous to deal with him. You'll never know what next he's up to. He's a psycho.

"Please Asghar" I surrendered "just please" I whispered. "Kiara might here us, just please". He laughed "and so what?!".
I felt my eyes already glossed up. "Please" my voice was already breaking due to shortage of air. He hesitated a bit and remained silent. He then pressed my head against the floor really hard. I groaned in pain before he finally released me and got up.

I could already feel the headache that was gonna prevent my sleep today. I sat up and rubbed my head reciting bismillah on it as I grabbed my head scarf and put it around my hair, then managed to get up and walk to the bathroom. I got in, Locked the door cus I wasn't in for a surprise by Asghar, then turned on the shower.

What am I meant to do?.. I'll only be able to save Kiara and Isra. They're all I have. Asghar's son Jameel didn't seem to be interested in a real life. At least, if I'm able to get Isra and Kiara out of here, it's a win. Even if I don't get to escape this terror. At least my two kids will.

I got into the broken shower as the water became warm. I sat down and allowed the warm water wash away blood from my body.

As I bathed, thoughts ran through my head. What if we moved back to Zaria?.. would Asghar find us?. Well the last time we ran off, he made sure he got us back. He did give us a proper welcoming. A very good one for sure. Or maybe we didn't just hide well? Considering the fact that we went to my late fathers house, which obviously was the only place I had. So Asghar's suspicion was correct. It didn't take him long to find us. Just two days.

I think the best thing to do, is to hand the kids over to a shelter, or a family who has room for two. I don't think I have a way out of this. This is my destiny...

First chapter!!!! Woooo!!! Stay tuned !
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