A Spirit Between Us (bxb)

Chapter 1 - Finn.

What's the definition of perfect?

Finley O'conner.

He had all of the desirable elements, qualities and characteristics of a perfect life. A perfect identity.

Being a direct copy of any typical jock love interest in a rom-com, He was, predictably, the star quarterback of his high school football team, which in result came with a built in group of "friends" who seemed to think their life's goal was to make everyone else's miserable. With his tousled brown hair that was just about long enough to throw into his iconic man bun, sunkissed skin, and ridiculously gorgeous sapphire blue eyes, he looked like he'd walked straight out of a teen magazine.

The only thing ruining his cliché existence was the lack of an irresistible, blonde girlfriend with a special talent for eye rolling and an impressive skill to turn any mundane situation into a soap opera worthy melodrama.

But that's not the life that he wanted.

Finn had always felt so out of sync with the rest of world around him. He never quite fit in anywhere, as if he were a square in the vast universe of circles, never fully understanding why his shape was different. While all of his friends had their first childhood 'relationships' and pretend marriages on the playground in elementary school, Finn was off on grand adventures, pretending to be a pirate captain and sword fighting imaginary foes.

He knew he wasn't interested in girls the same way that his friends were when he was growing up, he never saw the appeal in romance or young love, but it wasn't until years later when he had his first kiss at 14, where the full truth of his sexuality hit his pirate ship like a rogue wave.

It was at a birthday party, he was wedged in a circle of giggling teens playing truth or dare, discussing things that seemed almost completely scandalous in their 14 year old minds. Finn was dared to kiss Lyla, a charming girl from his algebra class who had a sprinkle of freckles, fiery red hair, and those big, doe like brown eyes. She was sweet, and her kiss was fine, if you were into that sort of thing. But as Finn pulled away, he had come to a realisation.

He would rather eat seaweed than kiss a girl ever again.

Unfortunately for him though, Lyla seemed to think that kiss was the start of something magical between them, as if that tiny action had unlocked their blooming love for one another, and for the next few years, even as a senior, Finn was haunted by the gossip of their 'relationship' that circulated through the school halls. To Finns complete dismay, the rumour of his and her relationship still made its way around the entire school every month or so.

Finn hadn't told anyone he was gay. Just thinking about admitting it to anyone made his throat feel like sandpaper, dry and scratchy, as if the words would choke him if he ever tried to let them out. So instead, he shoved his feelings down, buried them under his dumb jokes and over the top antics, hoping no one would notice the cracks that lay just beneath the surface.

But deep down, he wanted to. More than anything. Every day he dreamed of ripping off the fragile mask he wore, finally stepping out into the sunlight as himself, not as the version of Finn he'd so carefully crafted in favour of others. The thought was terrifying to him, sure, but the idea of being trapped in his own web of lies for the rest of his life was even worse.

Finn was sat near the back of his drab history class, tapping his pen quietly against the table to the rhythm of a frustratingly catchy song that had been repeating in his head since the car ride to school this morning, which annoyed him even more considering this was his last class of the day. The lesson had only started around 10 minutes ago, but as always in this class, he'd already stopped listening to whatever his teacher was droning on about.