Rafflesia's Lament

Chapter 1

Death is the only thing that is truly guaranteed in life. Yet, no matter how many days or years have passed since Beta lost his dad, the realization that he would never see him again always found a way to haunt him. Right now it is hitting Beta more than ever. He couldn't understand why he felt this way. Everything in life was finally becoming better.

Especially after a health scare that almost made him lose his oldest brother. He had become extremely close to his family. This meant a lot to him because his brothers for many years were complete pricks.

He had clear goals in life, with a career as a hairdresser. He had hobbies such as playing music, video games, and watching horror films.

Most importantly he had found love. Their name was Fred.

Beta met them a few years back at a garage band meetup. Those events always had interesting individuals turn up, but Fred was unlike anybody Beta had ever met before. It felt otherworldly to get to know them. Being nonbinary and having claims of being a soothsayer hit the nail on the head for Beta's interest. It was fucking cool.

Still, it was becoming harder and harder to get out of bed some days.

"Beta, you have been sleeping more than usual," Fred commented. Beta opened his eyes to see Fred was reading in a chair next to their bed. Fred's long hair was tied up in a bun. It gave Beta butterflies every time he looked at Fred. Fred has a tall androgynous figure with hair almost meeting their knees and beautiful unique skin. It was dark with patches of white vitiligo. It made it seem like he was living with a supermodel. It also made him happy to be with someone who had a unique physical feature. He used to not be confident about his heterochromiaeyes but now he saw them as only a plus to himself.

"I'm just sad. Sleeping is happiness," Beta said muffled through his pillow.

"I disagree. Sleeping only makes you sadder. You need sun and socialization."

"I go to work," Beta rolled away turning towards the wall. "And I am still seeing my therapist sooooo."

"Just because you are seeing someone doesn't mean you are automatically ok. Are you holding back things when you talk to him?"

"No... Maybe a little. Fred, there is only so much she can do. He isn't a miracle worker. OK? I have been feeling a lot better since seeing him."

"But you are falling back into a rut. We need to address this because something isn't working. When you get home you go right back to bed! What happened with going to your brother's house every day?" Fred questioned further.

"Come on you know why," Beta muttered. Fred's question made his stomach hurt.

A few years back after Alpha bought his first house. Senpai and Beta would bother him by raiding it every day. After all, the house was way too big for only Alpha and his husband. Though Alpha was initially annoyed, he grew to like them being there. He even eventually offered for Beta to move in temporarily to be closer to the cosmetology school he was going to. Those times set in stone his brothers getting along better after so many years of avoiding each other.

Beta living there was supposed to be a temporary thing but Beta ended up staying longer to help take care of Alpha when he started chemo. He fully believed that he became the backbone of that family during that horrible experience. Charlie, Alpha's husband, struggled with anxiety and depression himself. Beta remembered seeing how lost and defeated Charlie was becoming watching Alpha waste away.

But Alpha was now better.

Beta didn't need to live there with them anymore. He was able to move into an apartment with Fred. And though he still sometimes visited it felt weird to do it too often. They were both grown men with their own lives.