Your Worst (Soukoku)

Prologue I

It's another average day in Yokohama. It is yet another day of hiding from the mafia for Dazai. Ever since he disappeared from the organization he finds himself ever so lost. With no one to run to, no place to call home, and the mafia on his tail, he really should've ended it all, right?

No, of course not. Dazai does not give up with ease. Ever since he was sold into the mafia, he's considered suicide. Yet, he found himself unable to commit such a deed. His constant excuse is that he is not to commit the unthinkable without a beautiful maiden by his side. Such a young boy's twisted ideas of commitment even weirded those in the mafia. It was no wonder he found himself as the next heir to the mafia so quickly. Their boss liked weird. Creepy...

He never cared much until he met a man named Odasaku. They didn't hit it off so quickly, much like most who've had an acquaintance with Dazai.

But soon, his mere presence had flipped a new page in Dazai's life. The young boy's eyes shined with stars, never seen before by another soul. Perhaps he's shown it once or twice in his very early days to those imbeciles he called parents. But regardless, Odasaku was different. He made the mafia a home for Dazai, but of course, no one is true in the mafia.

"Dazai..."

"What is it?"

Odasaku hesitated to speak. But he could not keep it in him any longer. He was not one for ulterior motives, and this time Mori had made him go too far. "I was sent by the boss to keep you in che—"

Before he could finish, he felt a sharp pain in his chest. A bullet has pierced him straight in the heart. Odasaku falls flat to the ground as Dazai stood tall above his dying body.

"Why?"

"W-Why what?" His voice was shaky and coarse.

"Why didn't you fucking dodge that?"

Odasaku didn't answer.

"When did you become so weak?!" The brunette boy, covered in bandages, yelled at him. Odasaku felt the skies turn gray as a drop of water landed on his face.

No. It wasn't raining, it was the boy's tears.

"A-Ah, look at you," he coughs up some blood. "the m-mafia's next heir...shedding tears l-like a toddler, a-and I'm w-weak?"

"Fucking answer me!" Dazai yells.

Odasaku struggled for a bit, coughing up more blood. He suddenly started standing up, wincing at the pain. Dazai moves to grab him, but Odasaku does so first and locks eyes with him.

"Hah..." he signs, "You're smart, D-Dazai." Odasaku falls once again, this time Dazai catches him and holds him close.

His hand reaches up to Dazai, "You understand why."...but before it reaches the boy, it falls lifelessly by his side.

⎯⎯ ୨ + ୧ ⎯⎯

"I'm not sorry." Dazai would still say, when deep down the boy's heart cried with anguish. He knew Odasaku's feelings had always been genuine. So why did he kill him? Why did he do this?

Remorse, shame, guilt; he lived with those feelings day by day. Maybe if he had done more, Odasaku would still be here. Perhaps he really was just a child, going rogue and killing the only person he ever cared about, and the only one who ever reciprocated those feelings. "If only you'd come back to me..."

Before he knew it, it was morning. Though still tired, Dazai got up from his "bed" (really, it's just the dumpster floor) and began his usual routine of walking. Yes, just walking, to anywhere he can. He had to stay active and leave no trace behind for the mafia to follow. Sure, he used to be the second highest in position, but that didn't matter. No matter who you were in the mafia, you were but a pawn to Mori. Once that pawn is rendered useless, there is no need to keep it around.

After walking for hours, the boy stumbled upon a forest. Though dark, and possibly unsafe, he entered it anyways. At this point, it's unclear whether Dazai had completely lost it. He left to find a purpose, yet he's willingly walking into danger. But until he's found a purpose, there was nothing to lose. Lucky for him, his risk ended with no consequences. It was any boring old forest that humans haven't destroyed yet. The only thing was a constant gaze. Dazai wasn't a fighter, so he did not initiate any confrontations at first. This could be especially bad if the mafia had caught up to him. He's hadn't seen a single sign of mafia for the past week, perhaps they had planted something special for him?

Upon seeing a good opportunity, Dazai calls upon the voice in a rather mocking tone.

"I know you're watching me."

"How amusing."

Appearing from no where came a short boy, seemingly no older than Dazai himself. He had medium length ginger hair and red eyes.

How interesting...

Dazai thought with a smirk on his face. The ginger boy sneered, "What's so funny?"

Dazai knew full well who this was. As a previous high standing member of the mafia, he knows just about every secret there is. He's even kept some from Mori. But it seemed the ginger boy kept secrets too.

After a tense exchange, the pair walked out as not enemies, but temporary allies.

"I can kill you if this doesn't work right?"

"I'm indifferent." Says the ginger boy, though his face deceives his words. Dazai notes his blue and expressive eyes. He extends his hand,

"Ah, so you're the host. A pleasure to finally be meeting you."

Thank you for reading Prologue I :)!