𝙎𝙒𝙀𝙀𝙏 𝙏𝙊𝙊𝙏𝙃; ʳᵒᵗᵗᵐⁿᵗ ♡

𝘙𝘢𝘱𝘩𝘢𝘦𝘭 𝘐𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦; ♡

𝗥𝗔𝗣𝗛𝗔𝗘𝗟 𝗛𝗔𝗠𝗔𝗧𝗢. . .

it was as if someone had punched him right in the gut. it was stomach cramping, nausea building up, burning all the way to his lungs kind of feelings. and the more he tried to unjumble the thoughts, the worse the feelings got. 

his eyes drifted to your figure on the couch, a remote in your hand and your tongue on the edge of your lips as you played against leon on some old retro game he found that day. all the while he was left to bounce his leg and stare at you until he realized that, he was staring at you, and so he drifted off into a staring contest with the wall.

he knows, he knows well that romantic and platonic walk a fine line together, because he will always want to take care of you, protect, and want you to be happy. so he really didn't accept this little crush until recently, now it's the only thing he thinks of.

he really must be sick, his heart is beating a little fast. but if he must go, your smile wouldn't be the worst thing to see before dying. i mean—you probably wouldn't be smiling if he was dying but, you know. you know?

anyway, your presence always had brought him peace despite the energetic and eccentricity heart shocks you gave him. but it was conflicting and he felt terribly bad for having caught feelings for a friend. surely, you don't feel the same? so it's nothing but trouble to entertain the thought.

but he couldn't help but wonder what your hand would feel like in his. (hand holding? before marriage??? how scandalous!)

he overhead your voice laughing with victory, your words were somewhere along the lines of, "ha! suck it, leon!" but he was far too busy getting lost in his own head and thoughts to really notice the words. he only focused on your laugh.

you made him happy, so happy. his body inclined to lean in and rest his forehead against yours each time he hugged you, but no. he always decided it wasn't the moment, not when he still had to figure himself out first. his friendship with you was too precious to him and he'd be damned if he made it uncomfortable.

for now, he was content with simply having you by his side, even as just a friend, even while the raging waves and storm of emotions racked through his body. whether you loved him platonically or romantically, whether this was just a small crush or he was absolutely in love with you, he wanted to see you smile, always. 

"hey, you okay, big guy?"

always... that much was for certain.