Forget Me Nots • CHISHIYA SHUNTARO

iii

THE HUMAN HEART

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Chishya often thought about young Hayato. A life he could've saved. A life that could've had value. A life that had so much ahead of it.

He often thought about what would've happened if the world were different. But it wasn't. Young Hayato died because of the way things were. He didn't have a choice. His superiors didn't have a choice. Something that could've been prevented happened because someone above them decided that things must be a certain way.

Chishiya had to bear witness to a mother's grief. He had said that day that he wouldn't carry it with him. But he did. He carried everything with him. Every life he couldn't save because a higher power deemed it unworthy, of little value, was carried inside him. He became even more cynical as he forced himself not to care. Until life, his own and the lives of others around him, had no value anymore.

He had always struggled to understand the value of life from when he was very young. He believed that by following in his absent father's footsteps and becoming a doctor, he would come to understand. That maybe there was value in saving lives and that was why his father was always working and never took care of him. But there was no value in it at all. And Chishiya was left to live his life feeling empty.

The world was selfish. He learned that very quickly. Especially when it came to medicine. There was no point in finding value when one's value was determined by money alone. And so he became selfish too.

When young Hayato, with bright and honest eyes, who simply wanted to live, died, the single piece of Chishiya's soul that searched for meaning died along with him.

He understood the way the world worked now at least.

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Chishiya's first thoughts about Arata were that he would be easy to manipulate. Based on the interactions he'd seen the other man have with Niragi and Hatter, he'd concluded that he didn't have a backbone.

It was also his eyes. Some say that eyes are windows into the soul, and Arata's eyes were wide open, showing everything that lay inside. They were far too honest, especially for this world. It was no wonder he was a target for a man like Niragi, who seemed to enjoy bullying the weak.

But Arata was a goldmine of information. The tour he gave was very insightful to their new environment.

"Hatter founded this place. He intended for it to be a utopia for survivors, a place where we could let loose and have fun, because we never know when we might die. Then one day he claimed to have found an answer, a way for us to go home. He's provided hope to all of these people that if they work together to collect the cards, then one day they might be able to leave this world." Arata had explained as he guided them through the Beach's hallways.

Chishiya likened the dynamic to a cult leader. These people followed Hater blindly, not even questioning whether his word was true. He doubted it was. There was no evidence to prove that Hatter's claims were fact, which caused Chishiya to be skeptical. The man just had enough charisma and sway over people's desires that they hung onto his every word. He gave them an escape in a world filled with death and destruction, and had given them a false hope to cling to. A false prophet.

As they were taken through the hotel, Chishiya only paid enough attention to the pieces of information that were useful to him. The partying bodies, the excessive drinking and drug addled bodies were of no interest to him. But he did pay attention to where they'd set up a make-shift infirmary in a basement area of the hotel. It was clean and clinical, with metal surfaces and a plethora of stocked supplies. He made note of how guarded the place was, intending to pilfer some of those supplies for himself. There was no doubt they would be useful one day.