friends.

ten.

Taehyung drunkenly leaned against the bar, staring at Jimin who was currently talking to another person. He was hoping he'd enjoy himself, but an uncomfortable feeling had accompanied him all night long.

I really need to study right now. Taehyung chewed on his lip and took in deep breaths. Another reason he didn't want to be there was due to the terrifying thoughts that just wouldn't leave him.

I'm such a disgusting person. I can't believe I have these thoughts about people. Taehyung looked down at his empty glass that was once full of vodka. He sighed and placed it down at the counter due to the intrusive thoughts to throw it.

I should go home. Taehyung chewed on the inside of his cheeks, taking a deep breath in and then smiled at Jimin.

"I'm gonna go home now, I've got a headache." Taehyung spoke into the boys ear cursing mentally when his voice wavered.

"I'll walk you home, it's dark and you're drunk-"

"No it's okay, Jeongguk's gonna walk me now anyway," Taehyung partially lied. He was going to walk alone, but knew Jeongguk would ask how his night was and show up when he found out he was alone.

"Okay, see you tomorrow," Jimin gave him tight hug, eyes lingering on Taehyung as he walked away.

Finally, alone. He breathed in the crisp night air, shivering a little due to the breeze and barely having anything warm on. He had hoped he would've gotten drunk enough to not feel the cold, but his thoughts barely let him get to that point.

Jump in front of that car.

God, shut up. Taehyung stumbled as he watched the car zoom past him, squeezing his eyes shut at the detailed image of being hit. What's wrong with me?

He continued to walk for a little longer, taking in the scenery around him but it only continued to get blurred out as more intrusive thoughts took over. He took out his phone and opened Safari instead, seating himself down on the edge of the pavement to read.

Of course he wasn't going to trust a random website about his thoughts. Thankfully, studying psychology allowed him to find the right essays and research that he needed to clarify his suspicions.

OCD AND INTRUSIONS
• OCD is a disorder where one can experience obsessions with compulsions such as obsessions around becoming contaminated with serious diseases resulting in the compulsions to obsessively clean. There are many subtypes to OCD.

But I don't obsessively clean, count, check my locks and stuff. Taehyung helplessly scrolled some more hoping to find some answers.

• 'O' type
The 'Pure O' sub-disorder under OCD is where one experiences obsessions, but no compulsion. They experience unwanted thoughts that are obsessive but no compulsion flows in relation to them.

• Harm OCD
A person may have unwanted thoughts to harm others around them such as 'What if I stab them right now?' 'What if I harm myself with this knife?' And the compulsions my include avoiding sharp objects.

Taehyung sniffled and swiped off the app, instead looking up at the empty road with a dazed expression. He decided to hurry and get back before he did something stupid. With a shaky sigh he pushed himself up and began to drag himself down the pavement.

Slowly his head turned to the car nearing him and more unsettling thoughts began to emerge, the need to just walk in front of it began to get worse the closer the car got.

What if I ran in front?

Taehyung squeezed his eyes shut at the imagine of him being hit, he decided to focus on getting home safely. So, he pulled out his phone and quickly began to call Jeongguk, listening to the ringing which only lasted a second.