The Unexpected (Book 3) ~MxM~

Problems in Paradise

Victor

I plop the second batch of laundry over the washing machine and start picking apart colours.
Last night was pure madness. I thought that Parvati was finally feeling better asking me to go to a restaurant on a Friday like old times. I said yes,because I was happy,my smiling girl was back.
Then half way through the meal I look one way for two seconds and on the third she's gone. I ask the waiters,the staff and a couple people who could've seen her no one knows where she went.
It's past sunset and it's dark outside,cold and raining. A thunder storm out of the blue. I'm panicked and scared because she's not inside the restaurant. Every corner was searched over exactly an hour. Anything could've happened in that terrifying hour.
She could've been suffocating if she hid somewhere small.
She could've been lost and scared calling for me.
And out of all the possibilities there was something much much worse. She went outside.
The danger triples outside the safety of the restaurant. And it's raining? She could be somewhere getting soaked. She could slip on the wet pavement and hit her head.
She could be kidnapped.
Then I'd really lose her.
The thought of how scared I was makes me short of breath,I shut my eyes to get the memory of last night to calm down. But as I hold the damp clothes she wore while running through a storm I just... I just can't shake the thought that something really might have happened to my daughter.
She's been like this since the trip to the hospital that changed everything.
She's had more tantrums,more crying,more yelling. Which is so unlike her. Normally she just runs around and smiles. Now she throws things,gets into fights at school and me,the person she once called her best friend in the whole world has become her sworn enemy.
I stare at her closed bedroom door,white but you can barely see it because she's covered it in stickers and hand drawn posters across the washing room. When was the last time she opened that door in the middle of the night to come to my room and say that she had a nightmare and she wants to stay with me?
Weeks ago. Just weeks ago,but it feels like painful eternity has passed. My little ray of sunshine became something I don't recognise. I just want to help but the closer I get the more she pushes me away over and over until I just don't know what to do.
The images of last night resurface because they were definitely the breaking point. The biggest stunt she pulled ever since she started getting treatments. Successfully tricked me,ran away and broke into a veterinary clinic in the middle of the night.
All children are different but that? That takes the time out cake.
She'd rather hug a stranger. A stranger. Than just willingly go home with me.
Making me not a bad daddy but the worst worst daddy. Ever. Her words not mine. And yeah,that hurt like putting a bare palm on a hot pan. Really really stung me. Especially since I don't even know what to do to make it up to her.
I pick up another piece of clothing with a sigh and stare at the wet and extremely unfamiliar white lab coat in my hands. Their name on the right of it,under a breast pocket.
Oliver Williams.
The stranger my daughter chose over me.
A flash of the fresh memory is before me. Smooth golden skin and a heart shaped face,his locs wild and long around his shoulders. Round glasses and even rounder eyes as he stared at me. From the floor.
Just before I walked in it look like they were playing dress up. His hands were in her hair and she was smiling.
Actually,full on grinning. It's been more that a month since I saw her that happy. And then I walked in and that all changed she was angry and Oliver the stranger just blinked up at me with fluttering lashes. Like he had something to say but was shocked out of words when I was declared the worst,(x2) dad ever infront of him.
The sting is back when I think about it.
I wonder how long and how much it'll sting. Maybe forever if I don't fix this.
I need to go back to that vet and face him. Even though I really don't want to,no matter what it's for I have to return his coat and apologise for the chaos and making his floor wet. It's the nice thing to do. Is what Austin would tell me.
Great,now the people in my life are living in my head.
Getting the wash started I walk off and brave Parvati's room. The room I choose out for her in the house when I bought it. It was small and had the perfect dimensions. When she grows up she's free to switch with any of the two guestrooms. But for now this is her little haven.
Normally it's nothing but a spread bed,baby blue walls (her decision) and a toy corner which is supposed to have all her toys there but sometimes she would decorate her bed with some of them. That was then.
Now,it's messy and no one's cleaning it because she rarely lets me in and she's not cleaning it herself. Last week I politely asked her to clean it while I was passing by and she walked out without a word to me.
The remnants of a tea party she had with her dolls lies in the middle of the room. Her favourite tea set,well - her only tea set because she broke the other one by pouring my hot coffee into one of the tiny cups. Let's just say someone got a burn and the cup melted from the heat.
With a sigh,I start arranging things while the little lump of a person is still asleep. "Stop that. I'm still going to play."she groans from under the blankets,I slowly place everything back in its original position.
"Someone's up early."I say to the unmoving lump as I walk towards the bed. When I don't get an answer,I poke around her a couple of times. Throwing the blankets off she frowns at me,
"Daddy! I'm too old for you to be tickling me."I have to suppress the words on my tongue. My days are now plagued with I'm too old for this and I'm too old for that. Each and every time I just want to blink and say "You're five years old. Five."I mean isn't that crazy? She's still a little baby,she shouldn't be old enough for anything yet.
"Okay. Just saying you're up early."
"I can wake up when I want."
"Of course but it's Saturday."
"Exactly,it's Saturday. I can sleep as long or as little as I want."she says through a yawn,and I take the opportunity to pat her head,
"Yeah. You're going to grandma's today,though. What happens if she sees you're tired?"she flicks my hand off of her head and gets up. We stare at each for a while. There's no denying that there's tension between us. Something that was never there before just lurking around like a ghost.
I have to hold my tongue to ask her if she really thinks I'm the worst.
I mean kids say things. They say a lot of things. But worst,worst dad ever isn't just something you should be ignoring. No matter how mad or upset she got the most I've ever been reduced to is mean and most of the times she didn't mean it. But...
It's stinging again. When she looks at me,I can tell she knows what I'm thinking. Like she can see inside my head.
"I want to go to the vet first."
"Is this about wanting a service dog?"I ask and she avoids looking my way. I don't think I have a way to explain to a five year old that until she's diagnosed she isn't recognised as disabled by the state. Even if she can barely hear at the moment. "Bean? Is that why you ran away?"
"I didn't run away..."she whines,
"Okay but you ran away from me."and that hurt me,a lot.
She keeps silent and I barely,just barely keep from asking if she hates me. That's not a question to be asking her,a five year old.
"To go to Oliver. He's safe."
"How do you know his name?"I know for a fact she didn't take the time to read the name on his coat.
"I- I read it online."I drag in a breath and cover my mouth. How did I not notice? That's why she asked for my phone on Thursday. That's why she choose a restaurant she'd never gone to before. When did she get so smart anyway?
I really don't think I can talk about this right now without yelling.
"Get ready to go your grandma's."I say getting up and ready to leave the room.
"Are you going to work today?"she's asked me that question every day at around the same time every morning for the past three weeks. I don't know what connection it has to anything but it sure feels like it does have one.
"Maybe in the afternoon. Only if I get called in."
"... okay."I nod and tap her door frame once before leaving.

_______________

Once I drive into my mother's neighbourhood Parvati jumps out the car before I even stop parking. My scolding dies on my tongue because she's already inside the house when I think of what to say.
Little rascal.
My older sister,Misti watches the entire ordeal with wide eyes. She shouts out to Parvati trying to get her back out but to no avail. I turn off the car and walk to the porch,"You look terrible."is the first thing my sister says to me,
"Didn't get enough sleep."I supply rubbing my eyes to make sure there's no sleep lint in them,
"Thinking again?"
"Parvati ran away."Her hands fly to her lips in shock,
"When?"she gasps with her hands on her hips following me,clearly tired of my nonchalant attitude,"Victor Abir Khan,when?"she asks again,
"Last night. It was for like... almost two hours. I couldn't find her anywhere."
"Where had she gone?"
"We were at a restaurant but then she ran to the veterinary clinic across the street."when I conclude my explanation she touches her chest like its aching,
"Is it about the service dog?"she whispers and I nod letting myself into the house and sitting on chair next to the kitchen. The house is familiar to me even with my eyes closed. It's my childhood home and the place I spent a lot of time at when my little girl came into the world. So I can never forget this place,the constant presence of my mother,my dad and my siblings from time to time is not something to take for granted.
At least I can be at ease knowing that she's not ran away again and is probably looking for her grandma. "Sorry for putting on the kid show that told her everything about service pets."Misti says with sad face,
"Don't say sorry. There's no way you could've known that it was in that episode. Besides she would've found out somehow."
"Can you not just get her a dog?"
"And whose going to come back and feed him when I have a long day at the shop? When I have to spend the night there? Pets are like are another baby and I already have a handful of 'child' on me right now."
"Yes, but that's what she wants though."A pause,"Maybe you should just consider it. Her mental state is getting worse lately."
"That much is true. I think she's starting to hate me."she smacks my arm and pushes her glasses upwards with one finger.
"How could you say that? You know how she is when you leave,daddy this,daddy that. She adores you."
"... last night at the vet when I went to get her she said I was the worst,worst dad,ever."
Pregnant silence sits between us and she sucks in a breath. "With both the worst?"
"Yes. While hugging a stranger instead of me."the images of said stranger are back in my head. I can't think of the incident without thinking of him. He just comes with the package of the horror of seeing my daughter soaking wet,on the floor with a strangers hands in her hair.
And you thought that stranger was cute.
I push the thought away immediately and stuff it into the deepest,farthest corner of my mind never to be thought of again.
"Hmm. I'm just saying to entertain the idea for a little. Do some research and figure it out. Maybe it can work out. I think she deserves a little encouragement."
"In the form of an animal who can't talk instead of her father. That's rich."
"Abir! You came,I thought you just dropped little Pari off."my mother says coming down from the stairs and pulling me into an embrace. To her I'm not Victor. I don't remember any moment that she ever called me by that name. It was my father's idea to name me Victor and my mother's to have me called Abir. After a lengthy argument I was given the name Victor and Abir. Win-win.
"Ma."I say hugging her back quickly because Parvati clearly has other plans for her grandma.
"Have you been eating well? How about sleep? You look tired."I am. I am so extremely,tired and exhausted.
"I'm okay."there no way I'm telling my mom that I ran in the rain after Parvati and had to struggle to get her inside my car at ten at night while she wailed and threw her hands everywhere. My mother is old,and she definitely needs to live in peace. Not dealing with my issues. I made her do that once but never again.
"What is dear? What do you want to show me?"the pair disappear into the living room where Parvati will show her newest drawings to my mom,
"Remember what I said,Vicky."Misti cautions before leaving. And I decide that I probably should entertain the idea.
If I want to have my little girl back.