[The scene opens with a shot of Hello that slowly zooms in on the Happy Hotel. The sound of the busy streets can be heard in the background. The scene transitions to a closed door labeled "H.A.Z.B.I.N. Headquarters", with a crude sign made from a sheet of notebook paper that reads, "Meeting in progress" with a smiley face drawn next to it. The light flickers as the camera zooms in on the door. Inside, Charlie is walking in front a whiteboard on the wall as she lectures her employees.]
Charlie: Alright. Now, I know business has been... a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here... *looks at Husk* Husker.
[Husk gives her an incredulous look in response.]
Charlie: Now, does anyone have... any bright ideas on how we can get business drummin' up again?
[Angel Dust raises his hands]
Angel Dust: Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me!
Charlie: Angel Dust?
Angel Dust: eyes sparkling* What about a car wash?
Charlie: This is Hell, Angel. No one cares about cars being clean here, okay? *thinks for a second* Wh- Ooh! What about a billboard?
[She waves her hands with an enthusiastic flair as sparkles fly out.]
Husk: *rolls eyes* We can't afford a billboard, kid.
Charlie: *wraps her arm over Husk's shoulder* Helpful, Husk. Really glad you're in the room right now. *pushes Husk away* Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?
[Charlie turns on a TV that shows the H.A.Z.B.I.N. brutally murdering people from the overworld as they are paid to do. Charlie whacks a man in the face with a mallet, Husk is blown away firing a shotgun through the mouth of a man tied to a chair, Alastor swings a man back and forth in his mouth, and Angel decapitates someone with a harpoon and laughs. Then, it zooms out to everyone watching the TV, with Alastor, Angel Dust, and Charlie eating popcorn.]
Charlie: Ahh, those were the good times.
Husk: Don't remind me, Charlie. Considering you blew most of our salaries on an stupid fucking AD last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel... THAT NOBODY EVEN WATCHES!!
Charlie: Uh, hey. Excuse me? What's "stupid" about a super-fun jingle, alright? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit!
Angel: People love musicals, Husky.
Charlie: Exactly, Angel! And we're basically doin' a musical. *does jazz hands* Are you gonna crush my musical theatre dreams like my mother did?
Husk: Charlie--
Charlie: 'Cause, right now? All I see is just my mom's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside.
Angel: You tryin' to crush her dreams, Husky?
Husk: No, I wasn't-- What?
Angel: *flirtatiously* I thought I knew you.
[He playfully sticks his tongue out at him as Husk blushes and rolls his eyes.]
Charlie: I can't believe you, Husk!
[She tearfully holds up an employee of the month plaque with Husk's picture on it.]
Charlie: And after I made you employee of the month!
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Hazbin Boss
FanfictionHazbin Hotel x Helluva Boss swap au where the Happy Hotel is a group of murderers. Roles Charlie as Blitz Husk as Moxxie Angel as Millie Alastor as Loona Vaggie as Stolas Valentino as Stella Vox as Striker Vellvette as Fizzarolli Carmilla as Ozzie S...