OMNISCIENT
November 7th 2024
"I don't know what to do. This just isn't fair. Everyday I've dreamt of being desired this way and now I'm expected to push her out of my life?"
She rushed out.
The older woman observed her patient, further listening and deciding on how she would decide to tackle such a topic.
"Jana, Can you tell me in full detail what exactly happened?"
"There's nothing to tell. I've been sleeping with her, and I'm probably going to be suspended and Amina is going to kill me. I feel like I'm going insane."
This entire situation was progressing far too fast. She wanted out but it was already too late.
"When's the last time you saw her?" Grace questioned.
She sat in silence, desperately trying to decide if she should tell the truth. Jana knew first hand that not being truthful from the beginning would only result in lies that she couldn't keep straight.
"...I saw her last week-"
"Jana." She interrupted.
"I told her we couldn't keep... doing this, whatever the hell this even is."
"Well as a therapist you knew that she was, and still is in a very vulnerable state, and this is probably making it all worse."
"I know, But-"
"Jana there's no buts in this kind of situation, you knew what she was dealing with, you chose to do it anyway and God knows how many different rules you've broken—I should be reporting you to the fucking state."
"But you won't?"
"I won't" she said reassuring the younger woman.
"Okay. Can you please help me."
"Only you can help yourself in this situation I can't control what you do."
"But you need to stop talking to her or soon you both will be unemployed."
After leaving her session, a weight felt lifted off of her shoulders.
For the first time in months, Jana finally felt a sense of solace.
She currently sat in the living room of her home, lost in her thoughts— something that happened constantly, When her phone tore her from her self sabotaging brain.
She looked down at her phone, identifying the phone number and hesitantly pushing her the green button.
She answered the phone on speaker, before throwing it across the couch and waiting for the woman on the other end of the line to speak.
"Hello?" She stated
Jana looked around, in pure shock. The last conversation they had ended with them both screaming at one another and she didn't think she'd be hearing from her so soon.
"I'm outside."
"What?"
"Jana-"
"Solené..."
"Baby just open the door."
That word. She knew she could never leave her alone. She had tried. She'd asked God numerous times to kill her if it was the only certain way she could leave, and she was still here.
