~story line~
In a world filled with suffering, a girl who has known only pain meets Jeon Jungkook, a feared mafia king. Despite his cold and ruthless nature, Jungkook finds comfort in the girl, who is emotionally scarred. Their love blossoms, but Y...
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JUNGKOOK POV
No matter how much I think, I just get more angry at myself every time I think about today's incident. What I did with y/n today was very wrong and irrational. Even though she is talking to me even after so much happening, I am still not able to forgive myself.
Why have I become so irritated and frustrated, I do not understand anything. The doctor also told that the injury is deep and there is also a fear of infection.
I really need a break. Because of this project, I got angry at Y/N for the first time, which was not even justified. It wasn't like I meant those things. I always assume that when I get Y/N back, everything will be very perfect. I got her, and I agree that there is no bigger happiness than her to me. But things are still not getting fixed.
I know very well that I am not doing well with Y/N by lying to her. If I had been a jungkook earlier, I would probably have told her the truth, but I have become so weak now that I do not want to take any risk so that even a little of me feel that she will leave me. I can't do it, I can't let her go away from me. I can't see my child moving away from me. If Y/N knows everything, she will never like to be with me.
I have become so insecure by lying to my own words that I feel that I am suffocating. I wish I could tell her the truth and make a new start. I don't have the courage to leave her for her will.
What was my mistake, I have never really thought of cheating Y/n. How could I cheat when only y/n was settled in my heart and mind? Cheat happens when you deliberately cheat someone, I never did something deliberately, expect engagement because I felt that y/n might come back. I know the method was wrong but my motive was pure.
I still remember the night when I unintentionally touched Meena. I was doing all that because I thought she was y/n. I was hallucinating things. There was no difference between reality and imagination to me that time. I did such a wrong even if I didn't want to, which I can probably never forget. I feel disgusted with myself.
THAT DAY
" I have come here because my mother wants me to meet you and know which type of the person you are. Look, I will tell you clearly now that I don't like you and I'm also not interested in marrying you, so it's big no from my side." I had just reached the private reservation made at the HOTEL BLUE STAR when I flatly refused Meena as soon as I reached after club.
" W-what?" She started stuttering with shock. I could see hurt in her hazel eyes. It had only been two months since Kang Industry collaborated with our company when Mr. Kang and eomma tried to get me and Meena married.
During this time I was so upset that even my body was not supporting me. In Y/n's memories i was half ruined and now on top of that this marriage thing was driving me more crazy. I had made myself so busy with the work of the company to divert my attention so that I do not think about y/n and any bad condition but But no matter how busy I have kept myself, y/n is not leaving me for one second. I also tried to move on but I get more crazy from the memories we made. She is my life, I can't forget her, no matter what.
