Resisting the Rival Alpha

Chapter Nine: What Does He Want?

KAELYN

That night, when there's another knock on the door, I can smell a girl on the other side. Not Saara. I'm not surprised, but disappointed.

This time, the girl that comes in brings dinner. It's a lovely steak pot pie with what seems like freshly baked fluffy crust. My stomach gives a great rumble, but I've made my decision. All I have to do is think about my father, and I lose my appetite.

"I'm not hungry," I say.

"But My Lady," the maid says, casting a worried look to the door, "you are commanded to eat."

Perfect. That will take my appetite away for days. That asshole thinks he can "command" me? What a joke.

"He's not my Alpha," I say, "and I am not hungry."

"I'll leave it here anyway, My Lady," the maid says, looking terribly anxious. I feel bad for her, but not bad enough, and I slink back into bed, smiling into the pillow.

The next morning, someone is banging on the door. I walk up to it and smell Lex on the other side.

"Go away," I say, making sure the door is locked. When it is, I walk back to the bed and lay down.

"If you don't open this door right now—"

"I'm not coming near the door if you're on the other side," I say. "I'll let in the maids, but if you're there, you'll get your wish. I'll stay in here forever. By myself. Alone. And take whatever consequences that ensue. As in, I would rather starve than see you."

I wait, listening hard, but never hear a response. An hour later there's a much gentler knock, and sure enough when I scent whoever is on the other side, it's another girl, a different one from last time.

This can't go on forever, Kaelyn, my wolf says. Surely you wouldn't rather starve than simply have a conversation?

And you say you know me, I say to her snidely.

This goes on for days and days.

I never see the same maid twice. So I don't make any friends.

I don't eat. Not once. I do drink water, as I don't truly intend on dying, but I know I can go at least a month without eating.

As the days go on, however, I find that I have no appetite for anything at all. My stomach hurts, and not just with hunger pangs. I miss Aunt Cinda, and, I find, the longer I go without running in the woods, letting me and my wolf free, I think more and more of my father.

It's the most I've ever thought of him since he's died, and I don't have it in me to chase it away with anger and fantasies of revenge. I just lie there and weep. Sometimes it hurts so much I get physically ill.

There is no lonelier spot than when your knees are aching on a cold, tile floor, lying with your head on a toilet seat at 4 AM.

I often don't have anything to heave up except water, but sometimes I'm too weak to make it back to bed.

Kaelyn, Kaelyn, please, this isn't good, my wolf pleads, you're slipping away. Something's wrong. She's been more anxious lately, pacing back and forth like a caged animal, which, I suppose she is. A large wolf in the tiny cage of my withering heart.

Jesus, now I'm starting to sound just like Aunt Cinda. Dramatic, fragile, and frightened.

The maids try and tempt me. Sometimes I think they might actually care, but I know they're nothing but Lex's minions.