Various Ninjago Character Oneshots (mini-stories)

[Jay] it's okay, you're okay

A/N: This song is not mine, but I did listen to it while writing this. You may listen to it as well, or not. It is your choice. 

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TW: panic attacks

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No matter how you look at your day, today was not one of your good days. Perhaps you indeed did laugh and exchanged conversations with your peers. You may also have succeeded in completing some tasks, but you cannot help but feel this heaviness in your chest. This harsh sensation burdening your lungs. Your heart crisps, trying to beat normally but failing to do so. You grit your teeth unknowingly, only realizing you do so when the tension in your mouth starts to throb and hurt. Your throat hurts due to the whimpers you try to keep silent and your temples ache from the anxiety you keep inside. Your hands try helplessly to release the building tension in your mind by grabbing and playing with whatever it can find. Your nose scrunches up, trying to ease the tears wanting to roll down on your cheeks. Your body wants to roll over itself, closing in from the exterior world. You try to think, to distract yourself, but all you can do is feel, to endure this panic that seems to come out of nowhere. 

You know that feelings are like that sometimes. They can be unpredictable and do not necessarily come from a conscious trigger. So, you kept it all inside, waiting for it to hopefully go away. Which is unhealthy and you know it, but you do not feel like processing these unwanted emotions. To waste your time on this when you could do productive on anything else. You tried all day, you tried to forget that weight and act as you do as usual. It worked for the most part. You seemed like your usual self. You are a bit more reserved and calm, but you look like you could be having a slow and steady day. Except for when you were visibly frustrated, but that could be brushed off as your regular anger. Sometimes, you even convince yourself you are believable enough. That your friends and family can not notice your negative state. However, there is always someone more clever. Someone who sees through the illusions one builds to ease their surrounding's mind. Today, regarding you, that someone is Jay. 

The brunette knows very well how it feels to panic. Most of the time, when he does, the others brush his feelings off by calling him childish or overbearing. Maybe he has a tendency to be scared, but emotions are real. Whether they seem proper or not, they will be felt. So, why disregard them when you can aid in easing the unwell person? Why not cherish the smiles and laughter around you even if you are exhausted and need silence? Why refuse to accept sadness, when that is the reaction they need to feel at this moment, to pass through what happened and become better once again? It all seems so logical. Yet, it is one of the most difficult things for humans to accept. Feeling emotions is mainly one of the most natural things to mankind, but it is regarded as taboo, unworthy and a waste of time. 

Jay sees behind the mask you put on today. He knows you are in pain, even if he cannot comprehend why. Depending on the day, the need for comfort changes. Sometimes, simply a hug is needed. Other times, being touched is overwhelming and the need for space is bigger. To distract, to listen or to try and give advice to the unwell person are all possible options. The curly man cannot know for sure what you need right now. Reaching out directly could also not work, the mind is a very complex system, and one can never be sure. 

So, he waited for you to say something or for you to hint at your situation. Jay stayed near you, in case you decided to do so but also to assure you were not completely alone. Sometimes, needing to be alone is to be untouched, left to calm down, but with someone you can trust near you, as a comforting presence. That is what Jay decided to be. He somewhat accomplished that. He made you smile and laugh throughout the day. Your freckled friend distracted you with some random fact he just learned in the scientific reports he reads on the news or his new project he is working on building. You never said it aloud, but Jay read it in your smile. You were thankful. With the small sparks shining in your eyes, he smiled back at you.