Caught (Matthew & Christopher Sturniolo x Reader)

Chapter 14: I'm not sorry for what I said

I got in the car seeing Matt for the first time in a while. Chris leaving my mind as I see Matt turning the radio down. "Hey" he said awkwardly as I began to buckle up for what seemed like a ride to the grave. "Hi" I say with a small smile as Matt began to drive. I looked out the window the majority of the ride not daring to look over at his direction fearing the costs of it. I knew I took a big risk even agreeing to meeting up and an even bigger one going against Chris's wishes but in the end, I needed closer and if Chris couldn't give me that, than Matt would. The ride was silent until we reached our destination. Matt parked as he sighed unbuckling before turning his attention to me but pressing his back against the car door. I unbuckle doing the same as I can now see his whole face. He truly was beautiful, and his heart was even prettier, but so was Chris. Chris was an amazing guy and amazing qualities, but after the past few months I wasn't so sure of anything. Life had been a wreck since they came home and a part me knew it was my fault, but it couldn't all be me, because I know they liked me back. "So, I don't really know how to start" Matt says as he plays with sleeve "There's really nothing to say Matt. You made a mistake, Chris made a mistake; I made a mistake, it's alright. However, I do think it could've been handled more properly, we can't completely blame anyone" I say as I scratch my forehead, allowing a sigh to escape my mouth "You know what, I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry for what I said or did, because it's true. I always liked you and Chris always knew that and because were triplets we share but you know what I've shared too much and I'm certainly not sharing you. For years I stepped aside and waiting for Chris to take my happiness just because I wanted him to happy, but you know what he's not taking anything from me anymore, and if it means we can't be friends then I guess we just can't be friends." Matt says as he rubs his hands through hair holding his hands up there for a moment as I sat there taking in everything, he just told me. "I loved you since the beginning, I was just distance because Chris liked you too" Matt the turned around facing the steering wheel as I sat in my position not daring to move. For the first time, I had no words. I didn't expect for this confession, but in reality, I felt the same way, sure Chris was always there for me, but he never got me like Matt did, and at times I only felt like Matt could cure my anxiety "I like you Matt, I truly do, but I can't carry the guilt of feeling like I have to choose. Choose between what, that's not fair, I can't live with that, which is why I decided to move on, because as much as I want to be yours, I don't want to hurt anybody in the process" I say as I look at my hands making Matt whip his head towards me. I look up to see a single tear run down his left cheek "I lost you once, it isn't happening again" Matt says as he grabs me pulling me close to him placing his lips on mine. I sat there in shock as I finally started to kiss back. At that moment nothing crossed my mind not even Chris and that was the moment I knew. It was Matt.