Ikigai (Hiei x OC)

*GOOD AND EVIL*

For two hours they hiked through the woods, a safe distance behind the others so that Airi's sniffles would not be heard. He'd tried putting his hand on her back, kissing her cheek... he'd even asked her to drop her wards so that he could carry some of the burden, but nothing helped. She was nearly catatonic. Finally, he'd had enough.

"Airi, stop," he said sharply. "Do not let their weakness affect you."

Her eyes, red and puffy from crying, could not meet his.

"But they're right. I feel like I've lost myself. I'm not the kind of person who..."

"Who what? Kills? Need I remind you how easy it was to look past murder when it was my actions in question? Do you think less of me because of it?"

"No," she said softly. "You had a good reason."

He laughed deeply, and she looked at him, confused.

"If the good reason was that I wanted to, then yes, I did. Why do you refuse to see logic?"

His question was met with a brooding silence.

"You killed them to save those kids, to save Akira. There is no nobler pursuit than that."

"... I liked it."

"And that makes you evil."

"I don't know," she whispered.

"You're being foolish, girl. Snap out of it. There is no evil. Only choices, and their consequences."

"You don't think Toguro was evil?"

"No, Toguro was an idiot, and the definition of irony. Why don't you tell me what's really going on."

She sighed and stopped walking.

"I just thought I knew who I wanted to be. And now... none of it makes sense anymore."

"Hn."

He knew how she felt, though it seemed they were moving in different directions. Somehow, her reserve of tears had not yet been spent, and more spilled to her cheeks. With his thumbs he wiped them away, then grabbed her face firmly in his hands.

"Listen to me. There will come a day when Yusuke and that orange-haired fool need to make the same decision you did. You do not get to walk this path without that result. They are boys, and they are naïve to the way the world works."

"I just want to be a good person."

"You are good, Airi."

His words had the effect he'd intended them to, and she threw herself into his arms. He would never forget the impact that same sentence had on him all those months ago. If he could credit anything with the development of his feelings for her, it would lead back to that moment. The fact that she could even consider herself anything but good and pure baffled him.

Shouts from the path ahead of them rang through the trees, and they immediately broke into a sprint. There were close to a dozen of them, more of those soulless men. Their group was already in the heat of a battle. The flash of a rose whip and the cracking sound of Yusuke's fist hitting jaw set free a rush of adrenaline in him. It was good to be back. He whispered in her ear before taking off, sword drawn.

"Be smart. Don't hold back."

Taking stock of the current fights, surveying the matchups, his first move was to assist Kuwabara. As much as he wouldn't mind him falling from the face of the earth, he had a suspicion that Yukina would be beside herself if he perished. The boy's spirit awareness still had not returned, and he was all but useless.