The Scum Lan Jingyi's Self Saving System

part 1: unwanted transmigration into a shitty novel as the Scum Villain.

warning: death.

"THIS IS THE SHITTIEST NOVEL I HAVE EVER READ!!!"

Lan Shen yelled out in rage, his fists clenched tightly in fury, squeezing the meat bun in his left hand, causing the meaty contents to leak out.

These are hours of my life I'm never going to get back from reading this stupid book that has no right to even be called one!!! 

As he spoke, bun crumbs flew in every direction. The tale unfolds in "The Grandmaster Of Demonic Cultivation," chronicling the escapades of Lan Sizhui. He's the offspring of the notorious Yilling Patriarch Wei Wuxian and the stoic Lan Wangji, one of the twin jades of Gusu. Lan Sizhui had a tragic past – his clan, The Wen was wiped out for the crimes their former leader Wen Rouhan had committed, and Wei Wuxian also perished in that faithful battle. An injured Lan Wangji recently punished for defending Wei Wuxian stumbles upon the feverish three-year-old Lan Sizhui (formerly Wen Yuan) with no memories of the past due to trauma. Lan Wangji takes him under his wing, renaming Wen Yuan Lan Yuan and adopting him. Fast forward, Lan Sizhui is the Lan Clan's poster boy, the epitome of all a Lan should be, showering all with equal respect – a protagonist too pure for the shoddy tale he was trapped in. Lan Shen devoured another chunk of the bun, his frustration with the novel growing relentlessly. The plot was scattered, the characters as shallow as a kiddie pool, and their issues? Utterly unrelatable. They were about as charismatic as cardboard cutouts.

Yet, Lan Shen couldn't put the book down—it was the mysteries and secrets that kept him hooked, the tantalizing unanswered questions and secrets all remained with a BIG FAT QUESTION MARK! And to think, this literary trainwreck was hailed as the "Book of the Year since Proud Immortal Demon Way (another shitstain book)"? Absolute bullshit-!

choking sounds came out from his throat, he could not breathe! he started to punch his chest heavily, tears streaming down his face. he did not want to die yet! the novel did suck ass but it did now make him want to die!!! fat blobby tears streamed down his bright red cheeks both from fear and his coughing. he screamed with the last bit of life he had "!!!MZDS SUCKS ASS!!!" and then satisfied with what his last words were, Lan Shen collapsed onto the floor hitting his head on the wooden desk leaving a nasty purple bruise but it did not matter anymore, he had already died...

Lan Shen's eyes fluttered open, confused and dazed. "Was it just a dream?" he thought looking down at his hands, or the hands that currently belonged to him.

The hands he was looking at did not belong to a young adult; they were much too small and tough with neatly trimmed nails, in contrast to his own big, unevenly cut nails, nails uneven due to his bad habit of biting them, were grime seemed to be a part of them. As he thought about it, he realized that the room was not his own at all. It was much too bright and clean, starkly contrasting with Lan Shen's room, which was in almost inhumane conditions. The lighting was practically nonexistent, and it was the opposite of clean. Clothes were thrown around, and the bedsheets were always messed up and crumpled. Lan Shen jumped out from the warm blankets of his bed and ran to the clear unblemished mirror on the wall to see his reflection. However, his face did not show in the reflection; instead, it was the face of a good-looking teenage boy.

The individual had a smooth, pale face with dark grey doe eyes and full, pink lips. Their cheeks were flushed red, and sweat coated their neck and forehead. They had long, silky, and thick black hair that was currently tangled and tousled, reaching just below their bottom. Lan Shen's eyes widened from looking at the surprisingly attractive face, and just as he opened his mouth to let out a scream, he saw something unexpected while immediately being transported to a very sunny hill with dark gray clouds hovering over ominously yet to cover the glorious yellow orb, the grass a crisp, refreshing dark shade of green which somewhat soothed him.

 There was a greenish translucent rectangular box in front of him with white Chinese characters written on saying, ["Welcome transmigrator, I am the system. This system operates in line with "A loss may turn out to be a gain", activation code: "!!!MZDS SUCKS ASS!!!"].

what the fuck?

The system explained, ["I can sense your confusion, so let me explain. You have died and have been put into another body."]

"So, like I have transmigrated?!" Lan Shen questioned horrified.

["Yes, and you have been put into the body of—"]

"THE PROTAGONIST?!" Lan Shen yelled joyfully, ecstatic.

"No!" the system interjected.

Lan Shen mumbled disappointedly, "Oh... ok, then a side character, that is fine."

The system continued, "No, you're Lan Jingyi, and stop interrupting me before I deduct B points from you!"

By the time the system said "Before I Deduct B points from you," Lan Shen was already panicking. "SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!!!"

The system remarked, "You're even more foul-mouthed than the other guy I had in Proud Immortal Demon Way."

"What! You screwed over more people?!" Lan Shen said, still furious and upset with being in the villain Lan Jingyi's body.

Lan Jingyi bullied Lan Sizhui harshly, degrading and humiliating him. Lan Sizhui, being a sweet and caring child though, did not fight back against Lan Jingyi's cruel treatment and treated him just like how he treated everyone. Also, Lan Jingyi was overall a real jerk, vain and self-absorbed, always breaking the rules and using foul language (though Lan Shen had to admit he could not fully blame him for the bad language part). Eventually, Lan Jingyi got his well-deserved karma when he got possessed by a resentful spirit and died because his golden core was not strong enough to take possession. When Lan Sizhui could have helped him, he did not; instead, he watched from a distance with a small smile creeping up his face. Yeah, Lan Jingyi's years of bitching really came to bite him in the ass at the end. But the problem now for him was he was going to get the karma Lan Jingyi got.

No, he was not going to suffer the same fate as Lan Jingyi. He was going to live a long, joyful, happy life, idling away to a ripe old age with no regrets or cares, without being possessed. He was going to worship Lan Sizhui, do him favors, and treat him well-

[no can do that is an OCC violation and will result in a deduction of B- points]

"!!!HUH!!!"