Silent trauma

The honeymoon phase

I've known my husband for two years before we got married to think that he was a complete different person before we met is an understatement I believe he was trying to show me who he was but I was to blind to see that he meant no good for me . It's like ending up at a dead end  the trip starts of good then you get lost with no clue where you are . We'll call him the destroyer the best memory I have of the destroyer is when I first met him in summer of 2022 at a hazy pond he had a white tank top on with blue  short  I had went to take a breather from everything  because I was feeling anxious but the person I came with thought I was lost and had no idea where I was  here comes destroyer to become night an shinning armor  I found the whole gesture cute an fantasizing due to the fact I was already  crushing on a guy who I just met  .

       So the truth is I don't think I ever got to truly know him I just went with what I saw  an that was oh he's so nice , he won't hurt me , he actually cares about me an genuinely loves me yea right  3 weeks after knowing him we started dating I had already met his family    He had already been dropping hints that he doesn't have the best intention he would always say I don't really love him an try to break up with me  the only time I remember him doing it was on the Puerto Rican parade an we ended back together less than 24 hrs an im lying that's not the only time I remember it's just pathetic and embarrassing how many time I let it happen.