Where We Left Off

Chapter 8

I lay in bed what feels like hours since my arrival at my aunt's house. My head is spinning non-stop, like thoughts are circling around in my head. I'm trying to make sense of everything in the last couple days how everything in my life went to shit. I know it's silly to be upset with everyone around me, because it's not their fault that Jackson decided to show his face back in the picture, not just mine but also everyone's' lives. 

Marcel lost his relationship with his son. I'm just confuse why he believes my presence will affect his son's choice to stay or leave again. How can I have such control over him, and even if I did; I would like to hope that we will still be together. But now, he did followthrough to let go our relationship so easily. I know I'm not an ignorant to admit that I was so in love with him, where a piece of my heart will always belong to him. We shared everything, having our talks that last for hours, our families were great friends and I've even thought after graduating college we end up living together but since that night, I knew it would never happen. Jacks just had to come to hospital and face me, so then maybe we could... I don't know anymore, because it's in the past now and at the end of the day Jackson is the one who made the choice that alter the course of our lives.

It's still hurts knowing that Aunt Justice kept the secret about Jackson's arrival from me, because his pops asked her too. I use to admire the friendship of our families, yet at the same time it can be really annoying. My aunt and his dad becoming friends happened when we started dating, Marcel believed I was the love of his son's life. I was the reason he never wanted to come back home. Justice constantly telling that she never seen a man looked at a woman the way Jackson does with me. Even Lindy was jealous how much time we spend together, that she had to create schemes to invade our dates. My parents were nervous how quickly our relationship developed in the course of within few months. But a stupid naive young girl I was, assured my parents I am in love. So stupid.

Staring up at the ceiling, with my AirPods on listening to different sad songs flowing through my ears, sometimes having sad song playlist. I need the singers singing about pain and constant heartache - letting me know I'm not the only one that's going through this bullshit. I just want to lose all my memories of him. Then these old wounds won't reappear again, they will be heal overtime, however if it was possible I would be lost too. It's funny how the one person can help you become who you are. 

I notice my aunt's head popped in of my bedroom door. I pulled my AirPods out and put them in the case. I rest my back against the bed stand, I waved my hand to signal her to come in.

"Robert just left, and I wanted if you want to go out for a late lunch or early dinner?" she asked, making her way to sit at the edge of my bed. Her hair in a messy bun, it's amazing how she's beautiful without any makeup on. Robert's comment how we looked exactly alike makes me smile, because everyone notice our similar appearance, and it was always annoyed my mother. She showed me pictures of herself and her sister when they were teenagers. And I pointed at my aunt, thinking that was my mother, I never seen her so irritated  and yet covered it up with a fake smile, laughing it off. She states I got my grandmother's dimples, I guess genetics skipped a generation to her younger sister. 

"I'm not really hungry" I shrugged my shoulders, I know my aunt is trying to find her opening to unpause our conservation from earlier. 

"Babygirl, you eat like your dad. Try again." she raised eyebrows, "I know you're still upset with me."

"I am. Not just at you, or Lindy. Maybe a little at Marcel" I wrapped my arms around my legs. "I'm mostly frustrated that no one thought to mention the asshole came back home" I say.

"Trust me, everyone is angry at the said asshole, okay" she smirks. "I believe, we all wanted to protect you. I never seen you so depressed, you barely ate anything, and you wouldn't leave your bedroom. Lindy told me you didn't even wanted to focus on photography anymore. I never thought my favorite girl would denied artistic talents, it was like you and your camera were soulmates. It terrified me seeing you so hurt, my heart was broke for you" she leaned in a little closer, "And I never want to see you like that ever again."