Barry kills Mark and David cuz idk

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*One day, a spooky scary thing named Barry decided to propose to David, after 35834909423483847327430 years of depression. So, Barry called David and brought him to Weenie Hut Jr. for a date. After a while, Barry got on one knee and pulled out a rat.*

Barry: "David, please marry me or else.....I will probably kill your mom....."

David: "TEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE. Stupid Barry. My mom died years ago!"

Barry: "Still though, marry me?"

David: "Uhm, no. Mark, my pookie bear, actually proposed to me two years ago. In fact, we literally had a child. Our beautiful baby boy, Santa."

Barry: "ERM WAHT?!?!?!?"

David: "Ya heard me. Anyways, Ima go kiss Marky Farty."

*Barry was clearly about to have a toddler tantrum. He had loved David for 35834909423483847327430 years! After getting rejected, Barry finally threw his toddler tantrum. He was heartbroken. So, Barry came up with a plan to get his revenge.*

*Back at Barry's home.*

Barry: "T-tehe. 🤭 I am going to CUTELY create a rat dog giraffe rhino spider hybrid to hunt down Mark and KILL HIM ONCE AND FOR ALL! TEHEHEOEHEHEHREHWOHEEHOWHWOEWHEHEHEHEEEHEOHWEHEHEWEHHAHAHAHHA"

*An evil rat dog giraffe rhino spider hybrid rose up from the ground and cried of jaundice.*

Barry: "NOW, GO HUNT DOWN ELDER MARK AND KILL HIM AND HIS STUPDIO SON, SANTA. OR ELSE NO WEED FOR YOU."

*The evil rat dog giraffe rhino spider hybrid crawled over to Mark and David's house*

Rat dog giraffe rhino spider: "Hello can I kill you and your family please?"

Mark: "I'd prefer If you didn't, thank you."

Rat dog giraffe rhino spider: "But if I don't kill you then I won't get my weed."

Mark: "Still, no."

David: "OMG WHAT A CUTE PUPPY!!!!!"

Rat dog giraffe rhino spider: "Erm what the hell."

David: "I'm gonna name you Puppy."

Mark: "How creative. Also, WE WILL NOT BE KEEPING THIS THING. IT ASKED ME IF IT CAN KILL US."

David: "PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE????"

Mark: "no."

David: "kys."

Baby Santa: "FATHA, WHAT DOES KYS MEAN??"

David: "It's a funny word."

*Later, back with Barry....*

Barry: "GRRRRRRRR WHERE IS HE?! IT'S BEEN 69 HOURS."

*The "puppy" walks through the door.*

Barry: "OMG THERE YOU ARE. WHAT'S TOOK SO LONG?! DID YOU KILL THEM?!"

Puppy: "No, they wouldn't let me."

Barry: ".....what do you mean.....they wouldn't let you...???"

Puppy: "I asked them if I could kill them but they said no."

Barry: "YOU STUPDIO, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO ASK THEM! YOU JUST...KILL THEM!"

Puppy: "Ohhh....can I have my weed now?"

Barry: "NO!"

Puppy: "Awww..."

Barry: "Y'KNOW WHAT?! IMA JUST GO KILL THEM MYSELF!"

Puppy: "You go, gurl."

*Barry breaks into Mark and David's house.*

Barry: "ALRIGHT, IMA KILL YA'LL UNLESS DAVID AGREES TO MARRY ME."

Mark: "DAVID, JUST DO IT. I DON'T WANNA FUCKING DIE."

David: "Nah."

Baby Santa: "Kys."

Barry: "ALRIGHT."

*Barry eats Baby Santa and Mark*

Barry: "HEHEHEHEEEHEHEHEHEHEHE NOW YOUR HUSBAND IS DEAD! SO NOW YOU HAVE TO MARRY ME."

David: "Uhm no." 

Barry: "Wha--WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO?! I JUST KILLED YOUR HUSBAND!"

David: "Yeah, but you forgot about my fish, Simone."

Barry: "Uhm, ok....so???"

David: "He is very much so capable of eating you."

Barry: "OH PLEASE. THAT TINY STUPID FISH???"

Fish/Simone: "Aight, say goodbye--"

*Simone eats Barry and Mark and Baby Santa come back to life cuz logic.*

Mark: "What the hell even happened??????????"

David: "Ask Simone."

Mark: "UHM WHO IS SIMONE?!?!?!?!?!!??!??!?!?!???!?!?!??"

David: Ummmm.....our fish....?

Baby Santa: "We have a fish?"

David: "YES?! WE'VE HAD HIM FOR 7 YEARS?!"

Mark: "Never heard of him."

Simone: "I ate Barry 😊"

Mark: "WHAT THE FU--"

*The end, Barry gets reincarnated as a rat. And Puppy marries another puppy named Patricia, Mark and David adopt 372929 more children and name them all Santa, while Simone moves to Alaska and becomes the new Albert Einstein because yes.*



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⏰ Last updated: May 17 ⏰

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