𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞, 𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘀𝘀

𝟎𝟎𝟓

𝐏𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐔𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐚𝐬𝐭
ɴᴏᴀʜ
𝘢 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳
𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘀𝘀' 𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁

𝐌𝐨𝐯𝐞-𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐝𝐚𝐲. The day that no one prepares you for. The day that no one tells you about. The day when the pain hits you like a train, but today, it's carrying cargo. A boxcar full of things that weren't yours, but after loss, are now.

JJ walks up to me with an empty box in each hand. "You ready?"

My gaze flickers between her and the townhouse. I stand at the top of the driveway like a child looking at the only home they've ever known. The home I built with Emily stands strong, but my heart feels more fragile than ever. I didn't think I'd have to be back so soon. The last I walked inside, there was nothing wrong. Everything was perfect, but of course, that couldn't last for long.

"Noah, before we go in, I should tell you that some agents had to go through some of Emily's things, but they tried to put everything back where it was," JJ explains, but I can barely hear her.

I furrow my brows and bite the inside of my cheek to keep my tears concealed. I don't hear much of anything. Officers are swarming the area. They've blocked off a three-mile radius around us, protecting me from my father—my only living parent. But I don't hear any of it.

I take slow steps down the driveway, each one feeling like I'm further and further away from Emily. Eventually, I'm at the front door. I take the key out of my pocket and slowly open the door. And there it is—home. A place I thought I'd never have to be in without Emily.

JJ puts a hand on my shoulder as we walk in further. "Again, some things might be out of place, but they tried their best. I wanted to make sure that you were able to come in and see it exactly the way it was. And we can go upstairs and get your things, they said—"

"JJ," I cut her off by putting my hand up. "Please, just one second."

"Sorry," she mutters and stands behind me with her hand still on my shoulder for support.

I feel my throat close up as if the very air is thick with memories. I can smell her perfume and feel her presence. It's almost enough to make me see her. I can see her running down the stairs to make it to work on time, yelling for me to hurry up. I see her attempting to cook in the kitchen with her short hair in a messy ponytail and food all over her shirt. I see her reading in the chair and looking up at me every few minutes to see if I'm reading faster than her. I see her asleep on the couch, having given in to her exhaustion trying to stay up while I finish studying.

She's all around, but nowhere at the same time. Only traces of her that can never be reclaimed.

"Okay," I say aloud. "We can go upstairs."

I turn to look at JJ and see her nod. She follows me upstairs, allowing me to go as slowly as I need. When we get to the hallway, my hands shake at my sides. I go to my bedroom, avoiding Emily's room, not prepared to be in her space just yet.

"So, what do we do?" I ask.

"We have lots of boxes, so anything you need, we have room for," JJ explains as she puts two boxes on the floor. "Where do you want to start?"

"Let's start in the closet, I don't need to go through it, we can just box all of it up," I say and turn to see Penelope and Derek in the doorway.

"What can we do?" Penelope asks.

"Everything in here can be boxed up. I don't need to throw any of it out. But if something looks like trash, you can just toss it."

"Can we start on any other room?" Derek asks.