The Infinite Light of Dust

Chapter One

Karina

As the shock wore off, we watched Elodie's husband, Phillips, come up my walkway and toward the porch where Kael and I were standing. Kael gently pressed his hand against my back to hold me steady. I could feel his palm flinching, shaking a bit. What the hell was going on?

Could there be worse timing than this? How did Phillips even get here? And when?

"Stay here," Kael said under this breath, but loud enough for me to hear.

I stayed planted on the concrete porch, listening to him for once. Something about Kael's body language was off as I watched him step down to greet the man who was supposed to be his best friend. Something in the way Kael's jaw tensed and his hand shook made me pay even closer attention to both men. Phillips had gone from some mythical man I had only heard about and seen pictures of to a real-life person standing in the middle of my yard. He hugged Kael and an alarm went off in my head.

Maybe it was because of the way Phillips was with Elodie lately—how he'd spoken to her on their video calls and the sadness in her voice and eyes when it came to him, but I no longer looked forward to meeting him. Not to mention the photo on Kael's phone, Austin and Elodie embracing, kissing, having an affair. I hadn't been able to even process that yet and now her husband was here in the flesh.

"Surprised to see me?" he asked Kael. The morning air was still crisp and dewy, and a puff of breath came out of his mouth as he spoke.

"As hell. When did you get in?" Kael responded, patting his battle buddy on the shoulder.

I didn't know if I should go inside or keep standing there watching them, but before I could make up my mind, Phillips's attention turned to me. Suddenly I wondered how he'd gotten my address in the first place, if he'd known Kael would be here, or if he was looking for his wife.

"You must be the infamous Karina," he said in a tone that could easily be either playful or sinister. I didn't know him well enough to know which, and the pit in the bottom of my stomach grew as the seconds passed. He rubbed his hands together to warm them. The weather was typical for a Georgia fall, but I guessed after being in Afghanistan for so long he was used to extreme heat, and being stateside would take a while to get used to.

I lifted my hand to wave, and it didn't go unnoticed that Kael moved around him quickly and strode back up to the porch. Something in Kael's eyes shifted, and for once I couldn't read his mind. He stood on the bottom step, putting a barrier between Phillips and me.

"I am. And you must be the infamous Phillip Phillips." I faked a smile.

He nodded, bowing slightly. "I am."

Silence ticked by, like none of us knew what the hell to say or do.

"Where is my wife?" Phillips finally asked.

"The PX," I blurted. The sun was still rising, turning the sky an orange hue. I would usually take it in longer, but this wasn't the time.

"Ah. I was hoping to surprise her, not y'all. When will she be back? Hell, I don't even know what time it is and don't have a phone yet. But what the hell is she getting from the PX this early?" He sighed, annoyed maybe? Or maybe I was looking for reasons to feel uneasy. He had just arrived from Afghanistan to see his wife and she wasn't here. I would probably be annoyed too. And thank god he didn't have a phone yet; what the fuck were we going to do about the photo floating around? I needed to talk to Kael alone, ASAP. I also needed to warn Elodie that her husband was here and thought she was at the store, not having a sleepover with my brother.

"I don't know, but I can call her?" I offered, trying not to let the panic in my voice shine through.

"No." His tone was clipped.

Kael's back stiffened, and he turned to Phillips.

"We can go to my place and Karina can bring Elodie over when she's back," Kael suggested.

His idea would only work if Elodie and my brother could get out of Kael's place before Phillips got there. There weren't many places the two of them could be, so they had to be at Kael's, where Austin had been staying for a while now.

Phillips shook his head. "Fuck. How long ago did she leave?"

"It's only been . . . I don't know, actually."

It was true; from the time that Austin and Elodie had left, everything was a blur. It was obvious why they didn't come back last night, but that was of no help to me or to Kael, who had to cover for them. My palms were clammy, my heart racing.

Phillips's nearly black eyes stared at me. I could feel him trying to reach for something. Maybe he already knew about Austin and Elodie? There was something so uncomfortable, so accusatory about the way he was studying me. God, this was a disaster.

"How do you not know?" he accused me. I took a step forward, though fear was creeping inside of me.

"I'm—"

"Don't talk to her like that." Kael's voice was commanding, and I was starting to feel like there was something I was missing, as always.

Phillips's lips turned into a smile, and he shrugged his shoulders back in a slow movement, like he was trying to control himself. Was he always this volatile? How could Elodie be married to some- one like him? My judgment was fast and harsh, but something was seriously off with him.

"Is something going on here?" Phillips turned to Kael, and the blood rose to the surface of my skin.

"Other than you showing up here without warning and getting pissed off at the wrong people, no."

Kael's response madePhillips step back a little. His shoulders slumped, and he didn'tseem as threatening anymore, even though he had to be almost six feet tall. In my mind, soldiers always carry a certain level of strength and intimidation no matter their physical appearance. But Phillips's bearing didn't feel like someone who was fresh from a war zone. He was only an inch or so shorter than Kael but a lot less built. He was much thinner than I'd imagined, but I had only really seen photos of him in his uniform, which always makes people look bigger than they are.

Phillips raised his hand and rubbed his forehead. "Sorry, it's been a hell of a week and I flew twenty hours. Bad first impression, huh?" 

He looked up at me on the porch and his expression changed to one of innocence. I tried to rationalize his emotions and see his side, but it was harder than it should have been. He was deployed until a day ago; I should have way more sympathy for him.

"It's not a great one, but understandable. Do you want some- thing to eat? I made some sausage gravy and biscuits. Or a shower? I might have some beer?" I didn't know why I was offering such a moody man alcohol so early in the morning, and I could tell by Kael's expression that he didn't either.

"We should go to my place. You probably don't even have clothes on you," Kael suggested. Again, my pulse raced. Did Kael not realize that Austin and Elodie had to be at his place right now?

Phillips shook his head. "I have a change of clothes, and a beer and shower sounds fucking amazing right now."

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught my neighbor Bradley watching the three of us. I had practically spied on Bradley many times, but for some reason I felt like he was seeing something he shouldn't. I was also trying to avoid looking at Kael because he was looking at me like I'd suggested we murder someone. I really wished I had my phone on me so I could at least check my broth- er's location and give him a heads-up that Elodie's husband had literally shown up on my doorstep.

"All right then, let's go inside?" I rocked back on my heels awkwardly.

Again, I could feel Kael telepathically cursing me out, but he stayed quiet as he led Phillips into my house.