Please, take my heart💋

Solace?

CHAPTER 6*                                                  
I am just gonna give in, I can't take it anymore. I have no strength left. It's like me and Ivan are fighting the tug of war with my door. My already shaky hands don't have the strength anymore and Ivan is too stubborn to stop. I leave the door and get aside. The door crashes the wall with a loud thud and Ivan is relieved at his success. He enters the room slowly and scans it. Everything is organised I didn't do any damage anywhere except on myself. I wipe my face and stare at my feet. "I am sorry, really this time",     Ivan says while closing the door. At that very moment I see the back of my door the white paint has red all over it's boundary and the blood which was dripping from the door has reached the floor and there's a patch of just red. I didn't notice I had lost that much blood I didn't know I had cut that deep but at that moment nothing felt deep and I get this sudden awareness to hide these patches on my door and floor and I look up at him but I notice he has already found the place I was staring at. Now he is the one staring at it and his back is to me, I can't see his face but I am sure he is certainly too angry right now that he wants to kill me myself. I can't do anything about it now. I walk to the balcony and let the tears fall. I have lost everything now at this moment first I had Ivan and I took him for granted now when he knows what I have been doing he would never want to talk to me. That's the trend we walk away from cry babies everyone hates them. I wipe my face again and there's that familiar hold again the one I love so much. "When did you two broke up? Can you tell me?", Ivan asks me after giving me the best back hug in the world. I think for a second but I don't wanna hide anything from this person. I come out of his hold and I wanna just die after seeing his face. He is fucking crying. He has wiped off his tears but his eyes are so red and watery and sad it breaks me. I hand over my phone to him. He knows the password and everything and after seeing it he keeps my phone in his pocket. "So is this the thing?",Ivan asks and holds my hand and takes me back to my room. I nod and he nods back then he moves closer to me and holds my waist with his one hand and hugs my head with the other arm and I melt and cry with my body shaking. His hands make strokes on my head and I let the tears fall. My arms are loose on both sides and I feel something so light on my head maybe it's not even there. It stays there for just a second and I get lost in my tears