Mutual respect

~one~

Summer started awake jolting upright from her bed quickly getting her breathing under control, she didn't want anyone to hear her, she'd been dreaming about Cedric again, his lifeless eyes staring at her. She shuddered the image was ingrained into her, whenever she closed her eyes it was all she saw. In actuality she had only seen him for a moment before someone saw her and covered her, it made it worse that she didn't get a proper goodbye, that she wasn't the one to close his eyes if so her dreams would at least end in his eternal rest but no the family didn't even invite her too the funeral, she didn't blame them, not really.

Everything had just been so wrong ever since, her Pa had insisted on them moving to a dark, dank terrace down a forgotten street in London somewhere. The house itself was owned by her Uncle Padfoot but he hated the place the only reason they were there was for some organisation her Pa and Uncle were a part of. Her Uncle felt he had to help it in some way so offered it a headquarters in the form of this damp old home. But now the organisation- know as The Order of the Phoenix- just kept everyone in the house who was under age in the dark, literally and metaphorically, they weren't told anything more then the bare minimum (the organisation's name it's purpose and why they had to stay stuck in the house) and they also had to clean it to make it hospitable which was taking so long that the few grimy windows there were weren't top priority cleaning wise and the occasional working lamp seemed to almost always flicker on and off faltering until some days they just didn't turn on. Summer hadn't actually taken part in the cleaning, in fact she very rarely left her room and never spoke to anyone, not anymore, not since he... not since the end of the Third Task. Huddled up in the corner of her four poster she let her mind wander, it was about 5 in the evening, just before dinner time, but she never usually went down while everyone was downstairs and distracted she would sneak up to Buckbeak (her Uncle's hippogriff)'s room and lie under his wing, the only time she could sleep without being haunted by images of her honorary brother's death.

Sitting in her bed she let her thoughts wander when she heard voices outside her room she listened keeping her breathing steady making it sound like she was sleeping.
"Has she spoken at all?" That was her Pa who was he talking to?
"No..."
"What?! What is it? That was coming with a BUT I can feel it" that sounded like her Uncle but the other voice? It was too muffled and quiet, she couldn't quite make it out though she had an idea who it was, it was feminine like-
A sigh "I hear her say things, when she actually falls asleep and isn't just faking it so we leave her alone,"
"Well? What does she say" worry was laced through her Pa's voice. Another sigh it's definitely Hermione, Summer thought as Hermione continued,
"I- She says... I don't know, I can't say"
"Just tell us it might be the only way we can find how to help her" Sirius said, Summer felt tears prick the corners of her eyes her Uncle, her Pa they were trying to find how to help and she'd just pushed them further away, she didn't cry she hadn't since that night she blinked the tears away and continued to listen, a breath drawn from Hermione, whatever Summer had been saying must not be good she suddenly realised the two men had no idea how Summer felt for Hermione and she worried she had said something utterly revealing and Hermione had heard!Summer had no clue how Hermione felt about her as with everything and everyone else it was pushed away after HIS death but her feelings wouldn't leave. Hermione continued,
"She kept apologising to Cedric over and over all for different things, sometimes for not taking his place and dying for him, sometimes for not closing his eyes when she saw them left wide and therefore not letting him rest in peace sometimes..." She stopped sniffing it was clear she was holding back tears " Sometimes for not moving on with life as they promised each other they would do if the other ever-" she chocked " and sometimes, only once, I heard her apologise to him for not ad- for not admitting her love to the person she cared for earlier so he never saw them together" Hermione had broken down, Summer could hear her Pa patting her back and her Uncle speechless but still trying to form coherent sentences. Summer stuck the heels of her hands into her eyes and rubbed them then she lay curled up on the bed feeling utterly naked to the world as her feelings had spoken when she had said nothing and the world listened.

~~~

The girl lay, not truly asleep but not awake either as she listened to Hermione and Ginny's  steady breathing they were fast asleep unlike her, it had been almost a month since she had overheard her family talking with Hermione and since then the only time she'd slept were the couple of hours she got with Buckbeak when everyone we busy downstairs with dinner her mind was now blank she had nothing but HIS eyes gazing at her cold still and lifeless, before she had tried to think about other things distract herself from the truth and avoid those unblinking eyes but ever since that conversation it was as though her giant reservoir of thought had dried up and she only had that one image left, even her naps with Buckbeak were becoming restless, she was eating less and sleeping less she had- if possible- become even more reserved and it worried her Pa, her Uncle and Hermione greatly but they could do nothing, so they tried to act as though nothing was wrong and nothing troubled them.