The Search For John Winchester [REWRITE]

4) Chow Mien with a side of Sorrow

"Just let him breathe a bit," Percy whispered, anxiously glancing back to make sure Sam stayed asleep.

"I just don't want him to go off the deep end," Dean whispered back, frowning at the road as if it had personally offended him. "He went through a lot."

Sam Winchester, recently having lost his girlfriend, was, for the first time in a while, sleeping. Dean had quietly told Percy that he thought Sam was having nightmares; Percy had been able to guess as much on his own.

"He's already off the deep end," Percy said. "There's no shallow end when your girlfriend dies. He's not doing as bad as I was. I think he'll be okay. Just... don't smother him. He'll need space. His head's all scrambled and he's got to be the one to put the pieces together."

Dean looked warily at Percy, who understood. It'd been six years, and he was still pretty scrambled himself.

"He'll be okay," Percy reiterated. "Let him grieve. If he cries, let him cry. If he rages, let him rage. It's all in there and he's got to get it out."

"Our family doesn't have a history of handling grief very well." Dean swallowed thickly. There were days were Percy thought Dean was blind to his father's behavior. Days where Dean was the perfect soldier for the imperfect man. Then there were moments like this, where he would quietly, uncertainly, denounce the life he led. Dean liked hunting, Percy knew, but he could also see that Dean was tired. They both knew he wouldn't be so tired if John Winchester were a better man.

"Sam broke the mold, remember?" Percy smiled softly at him. "He left this all behind. He handled life a lot better than your dad did. I think he will be okay, really. Probably freaked the fuck out. Definitely different than before. But okay comes in a whole lot of packages, and he'll find the right fit for him. I did." He put his hand on top of Dean's, a warm, comforting weight.

And that was strange for Percy to admit. He still suffered, still hurt, but Percy was happy. Damaged and confused, but he had Dean, and he wouldn't trade that for the world. Well, maybe some Chinese. He'd do just about anything for some chow mein and spring rolls.

He was about to voice his thirst for food when Sam abruptly moved in the backseat, flinching before sitting up slowly, rubbing his eyes.

Dean glanced at his brother in the mirror, concerned. "You okay?"

No, of course he wasn't, he'd just had a nightmare. Percy could see it on his face. But those would fade with time.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Sam answered, voice low with sleep.

Dean nodded, frowning. "Another nightmare?" Sam just cleared his throat, uncomfortable. "You wanna drive for a while?"

Sam and Percy both stared at Dean in amazement. Once the moment of awe passed, Sam laughed. "Dean, your whole life you never once asked me that."

"Just thought you might want to," Dean said stiffly. "Never mind."

"Look, man, you're worried about me," Sam sighed. "I get it, and thank you, but I'm perfectly okay."

"You've never offered to let me drive," Percy said glumly.

"Do you even have your license?" Dean looked at him suspiciously.

"Yes," Percy answered honestly, "but it expired two months ago. I once drove Apollo to camp. That was a rough experience. I got hay fever."

Sam looked curiously at Percy, but received no explanation. He likely assumed that Apollo was just a guy with an odd name, but most everything else made little sense. Just how Percy liked it.

"Aren't you still upset that Apollo wouldn't let you drive his bus?" Dean raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.

"Yeah! He trusted Thalia, and she nearly killed us all!" He turned back to Sam, explaining. "She's scared of heights."