Phriendship

Family Parties and Squirrels

DANS POV

I hate family 'gatherings'. I mean i'm sure everyone does, but especially me. I am not a particularly welcoming person, unless I know you. And when my mother's cousins twice removed (or whatever the fuck they are) come over with all their family, its not somewhere I want to be. I have spent the past 4 hours avoiding questions about me and my personal life from bombarding uncles and aunts or whatever they are. Now mums put me on BBQ duty and I have to flip sausages and burgers while the dads talk about football around me. I finish a pack of sausages and sigh

"Why do we have to have the get-together on the front lawn?" I complain to myself, at least we are on a quiet street. So not many people see our family of bald ben and drunk women with kids running around and me standing sadly over the grill.

"Whats that son?" the uncle-dad-cousin asks me. I took no time to learn his name, but I think its Joseph or Jonathan or something.

"Nothing" I smile sweetly and turn back to the Bbq rolling my eyes. I plate the sausages and put aluminium foil over them to keep the heat in while I cook the rest of the meat.

"DANNY" Mum yodels sweetly from the ladies table

"Mum! Dan not Danny" I think mum has had one to many drinks with the ladies

"Nearly done, Sweetie?" she asks me

"NEARLY!" I yell, she looks shocked. I don't really care, she got herself into this.

I hear a car chugging down the street, great. Hey! Welcome to my shitty family! I look at the car, a blue Honda, looks a lot like Phil's one that was parked in his house. Oh shit. No. NONONONONONNONONO. it is Phil. He has the music playing and he looks pretty into it. He also looks really cute, just jamming along with the song. But I go back to panicking. I pray that he doesn't notice and keeps driving. As long as nothing happens ill be fine. Just then, a squirrel runs in front of his car. He doesn't see it until the last moment and stops his car urgently. The brakes squeak and he does so. GREAT, now i'm sure he'll see me. He runs out of his car quickly to check if he hit the animal. My mum walks over to see if he has done any damage. Great, he has. The squirrel is lying on the ground, breathing yet looking pretty twisted. He fumbles around in his pockets trying to get his phone out so he can call the emergency vet. He face goes whiter than it already is as he realises that he has lost his phone. Mum pipes in and I cringe, hoping for nothing bad to happen, but she is drunk and she always embarrasses me anyway so I just stand there.

"Here son, you can use mine" I pray that she doesn't recognise Phil, thankfully she doesn't. "Oh dear, mine is in the kitchen. You can just use my son's, he is always on it" She says and I die, I literally wobble at the knees as I walk up to mum. I hand her the phone and she gives it to Phil, I try to turn before he looks up but I fail and he sees me.

"Dan?" Phil says

"Yeah?" I say shyly as I turn around on my heels

"You know this boy, Danny?" Mum asks sweetly

"MUM!" I say through gritted teeth "This is Phil. You know that house that you dropped me off at last week? Well that was his house" I say blushing furiously

"Oh really? The mansion?" She says surprised

"Yes and no. That was the wrong house, that was number 44, he's number 45 but still."

"Oh, okay" She says slightly disappointedly. Why would she care, maybe she wants me to get a rich friend so she wont have to buy me dinners if I stay over at their house. Maybe she wants a new car or something. I will never know

Phil hangs up the phone and says, "Well, the Vet man will be here in 45 minutes. He says that Mr Squirrel just has a broken leg. Nothing life threatening" He sighs, obviously feeling bad for hurting the poor little guy