Güvnes OneShots

Don't Wanna Love You From Afar +18

For an unknown amount of time Neslihan stood on her feet staring at her reflection in the mirror in her living room. The tiredness embedded in her bones and the throbbing hole in her chest were her only companions in that night.

Her eyes deviated to her cellphone for a single second and her fingers instantly opened up her chat with Güven. They were aching to call him but she didn't. She couldn't. Not anymore. Not after ending everything between them.

Her focus changed to the rest of the vacant living room behind her, where they were only a few days ago reunited together. The jittering nervous feeling clouding their wisdom. How happy they were right then telling everyone about their wedding. How foolish of them to believe they only needed to wait for the kids to warm up to the news, to Güven's presence. How silly of them to believe their happiness could last.

'We just loved each other. You ruined my life, dad.'

Her words long said to her father after she learnt how he separated them years ago still echoed through the room. Her shoulders fell. Neslihan was exhausted, anguish was tiring her out. She felt completely impotent. Love ought to be easy. It ought to be enough. It should be the cure of everything. Then why was everything suddenly falling apart around her?

A knock on the door took her away from the self-pity feeling threatening to swallow her whole. Neslihan was quick to attend to it. Who could be this late at night? All of her kids have the keys. Serhan was at the hospital, completely incapacitated. Running briefly her eyes through the house, she realized with a pang in her chest they would need to adapt the house before he was discharged. Would she never be free from him? At least she got Güven out of the jail.

Neslihan slowed down her steps until she came to a halt.

Güven.

He was one of the few people the security wouldn't bother to announce. And the only one who would still knock.

She stopped by the door, stiling, afraid to open it. Looking around to confirm Ece hadn't heard anything, she took a deep breath and slightly opened it. He was on the other side leaning in his hands against it and, more than for his disheveled appearance, her heart broke in tiny little pieces with his inability to meet her eyes.

- I just wanted to start where we left of, you know? To recuperate the life we were robbed of. But that life not long exists, right?

His attempted laugh to soft the blow of his words felt hollow provoking a icy chill to run down Neslihan's spine - a chill she knew wasn't related to the low temperature outside.

- What do you mean, Güven? Are you drunk?

He chuckled but still refused to meet her eyes.

- I had coffee.

She nervously searched the front of the house and up the stairs fearing her children would show up right then.

- Why are you here, Güven? You're only making this more difficult.

When Güven answered to her silent request and finally looked back at her, she wished he hadn't. The bottom of his eyes called out for the despair she herself was feeling since yesterday's morning and what little of air she had was taken back by it.

- What did we do wrong, Neslihan? We just love each other.

Her eyes filled to the brim. She couldn't help but felt that all she did was hurt the ones she loved the most.

Güven's gaze pierced through the door wishing he could see her right hand to find out if she already gave up on them that easily but it was hidden. Fighting the ghostly claws crushing his chest, he sighed so deeply and long - a tired and hopelessly sound that made Neslihan fear what would come next.