A Girl From High Society

Chapter 27

Jisoo practically did not remember how she got home, because all the time, while the taxi she called overcame (for the third time in this day) the way from Park House to London, she cried non-stop.

She only managed to write a message to Lisa "I'm going home, there won't be a wedding, tell Jennie everything," turned off the phone, sat in the back seat, and then tears poured in such an endless stream that the driver - a fat, bearded middle-aged man - looked back at her all the way, apparently feeling sorry, and wiped her bald spot with a handkerchief, however he didn't say anything.

When she got home, Jisoo dropped her bag in the hallway, took off her shoes, went into the living room, turned on Babybird's "Back together" at full volume and, entering the bedroom, stopped by the bed. The one where they slept with Rosé yesterday.

The pillow, still crumpled in the shape of her head... The rumpled sheets smelling of her... The blanket that covered her up to her shoulders... It was all so recent, just this morning, and yet it felt like a million years had passed since they had touched each other while lying on this bed. They touched, kissed, whispered, heated the skin with their breath, died and reborn, bringing each other to the top again and again. They loved each other, and it seemed that this night would last forever, but morning came, and Rosé trampled Jisoo into dust, tore her heart out of her chest and took it for herself, leaving only bitterness and endless pain from which there was no escape...

Jisoo thought she had no more tears, but it turned out that there were still a lot of them, and she had to lift her head to the ceiling and try not to cry. Of course, she didn't succeed.

How can I live without you now?

How do I wake up every morning knowing that you exist somewhere in this world, but you don't think about me, don't remember and don't want me? How, because you have to get up, eat, drink, go to work, and I can't. I can't, because I don't have you anymore.

But you never had one, Jisoo. She has never been yours, even though tonight you were entwined in passionate embraces, kissed each other and studied with all the fervor of a long-pent-up desire. She has never been in your life, she just fluttered into it like a big beautiful bird that accidentally flew into a miserable room because someone forgot to close the window, lit up this room with the radiance of her heavenly plumage, filled it with the flapping of beautiful wings and flew out, leaving the one who lived in it to watch this the bird is followed in astonished awe. Because such people never stay, they just come for a moment and immediately leave you, because if they stayed, it would be too beautiful and improbable, wouldn't it? From the very moment when you first saw her, so beautiful and detached, as if frozen in her perfection, you knew that you would be destined to love this girl all your life, but at the same time you realized that she would never be yours. Is that right?

Jisoo lay down on the bed and buried her face in the pillow. If she had turned on the phone, she would have found on it three missed calls from Edward and almost forty from Jennie, whom Lisa called, but she could not tell anything intelligible, and therefore an hour after Jisoo's arrival from Kim House, they both stood in front of the door of Jisoo's apartment, and Jen with an effort pressed on the call button, and Lisa, rubbing her sore leg, leaned on the railing, watching Jennie trying to call her sister.

Thank God Jennie had the keys to Jisoo's apartment, because after three minutes of useless ringing at her door, Jennie never deigned to open it, and she and Lisa were a little scared. Upon entering, Jennie and Lisa found that Jisoo was lying face down on the bed and not moving. Lisa looked around. The window was open, and the rays of the evening sun were lying on the windowsill, Jisoo's bag was standing in the hallway, a dead phone was lying on the floor next to the bed, and it was clear that Jisoo had been lying like this motionless since the moment she arrived.