So I Married A Rockstar - Season 3

Ch. 1: The Night That Changed It All

Nola

Tonight should have been a dream come true.

Incarcerated, one of my favourite bands, were playing at the Diamond Theatre, a small venue not far from Drury Lane, and I'd managed to wriggle my way to the front. The band was almost within touching distance, separated from the crowd by a couple of feet of security fencing and burly bouncers.

Despite being one of the biggest rock-bands in the world, Incarcerated regularly played at smaller, cheaper venues, more accessible to the people who couldn't afford the higher prices of the big arenas. It was another reason I loved them.

I'd dreamed of this for months, but now that I was here, I couldn't shake the off the sharp spike of anxiety between my shoulder-blades. I couldn't stop scanning the crowd for his face. His ticket was crumpled in my pocket, but what if he'd still found a way to come here tonight?

Maybe, even though I didn't want to admit it, the tension I was feeling wasn't just about my ex-boyfriend.

For years, Darius Keller, Incarcerated's frontman, had been my hottest fantasy, and now my former best friend Tasha was engaged to Finn Donovan, a close friend of Darius's. Tasha's sister, Camden, was married to Jude Scott, the frontman of Angels & Demons, with their first baby on the way. Being at this gig was like getting a glimpse of the world I could have been a part of, a stark reminder of everything I'd given up to be with Mike.

And where had that got me?

The fangirl shrieking around me reached fever pitch, and my stomach swooped as I realised Darius Keller was right in front of me. The most beautiful man in the world stood on that stage, just feet away, his strong hands gripping the microphone, sweat gleaming on his bare, tan chest, his long hair flung back as he sang.

Some bands didn't sound nearly as good live as they did in the studio, but Incarcerated wasn't one of them.

Darius's smoky, raw voice filled the room, not missing a single note even when he was sprinting up and down the stage. Whether he was belting out hits to tens of thousands of fans in some of the world's largest, most famous stadiums, or performing to a few hundred at a tiny venue like this, he still gave it his all. Natural born showman.

I looked up at him, and his eyes met mine, dark behind a thick fringe of lashes and smoky black eyeliner, and for just a moment all my fear and doubt and confusion and regret faded. My mind blanked out, getting lost in the music, letting it carry me away from reality.

The moment didn't last.

Darius looked away from me, his dark stare roving over the crowd, then he whipped around, his hair flying around his shoulders, and jogged back along the stage, and though it didn't seem as though he was looking where he was going, and the stage was very small, he deftly avoided colliding with any of his bandmates.

Even though he wasn't looking at me anymore, I clung to that feeling. I wasn't ready to go back to reality yet.

But all too soon, it was over. The last encore faded away, the lights came up, and reality rushed back in whether I liked it or not, bringing with it a sick sense of panic.

My feet moved on autopilot, heading towards the exit with everyone else, but once I was out of the theatre, I'd have to face the impact of the decision I'd made today. I had no money, no one to turn to, nothing to my name but the small bundle of clothes and toiletries in my rucksack, and absolutely nowhere to spend the night.

Tears stung my eyes.

I couldn't go back to Mike. I'd never get out again.

And then, if he'd known I was thinking about him, he was there, standing on the street outside, scanning the crowd with an ugly look on his face. No. No. I shouldn't have come here. I should have known he'd guess that this was where I'd gone, and now I'd not only walked out on him, I'd cost him the gig he'd been looking forward to for months.