my heart is thumping,
shuddering, shaking, roaring,
beating harder when she's closer,
beating like a lovesick drummer,
beating like a foolish fighter,
beating like a hopeless prisoner,
trying to break out of the cage
my ribs kept it in since forever
desperate to tear itself apart
to find its place next to her heart
in a home in which the two would dance,
twirl and spin until they're breathless
to love at the same thrilled pace
to live the same unpredictable race.
but if she rips my heart out and lets it shatter
i'll beg the skies to let me piece it back together
just so that this freed prisoner can still wander,
on the same earth on which walks his one lover.
and on the day my heart finally surrenders,
when my lips lessen the hold on my last breath,
my eyes will close with the thought of her
still carved on the skin of my stone-cold lids.
with this maddening love turning me into a believer,
unsaid prayers to unknown Gods hanging from my lips
my dying heart foolishly yearns to see her again,
but as any heaven stripped of her would be hell,
my last wish is to be sent to hell if it exists with her.
and when they come for the rusty cage of my heart,
may they put it not in the stone but in her arms,
because her embrace is the only place
where my tortured self will forever rest in peace.
- 2023 ; a poem on a consuming love, a love so powerful that your own body feels like it can't contain it and you will forever breath and live with it, and on the day you die you can only wish that afterlife exists so that you can still love for eternity.
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