We play together on screen but i love him off screen. He treats me like a buddy while i treat him like he is mine. He who doesn't bat an eye at me and me who is hopelessly obsessed with him. Slowly on a path to find my him who loves me as if he is b...
"Cover me from the left! There are two of them." "On my way to you!! Duck and slide through"
"Hurry bro hurry !!" "AAH calm down, i am almost there" "Ambush them now"
"Last one on enemy team"
"Yo, get the target!!!"
"Go Go Go"
Target destroyed~
"HIGH FIVE BUDDYYYY" He directed his hands towards me, looking up from his phone.
"We did it. Another match cleaned" I cheered with him. We locked hands in joy as if we got full marks on our physics exam.
But the joy was shortened with the ringing of his phone. I saw the phone screen klight up with the name 'Valor_Amy', his another gamer friend. Must be calling to play valorant, i thought to myself. This is where all of it comes to end. I know the drill now.
As soon as he was done talking, he looked at me and said, "Gotta go, valo calls (His favorite game)." And with that he powers his laptop on and login in into his account.
I sit there, my fingers scrolling through my feed, but my eyes only on him. His long eyelashes just doesn't seem fair to a girl like me. Why must boys have such beautiful lashes, i mean all this guy does is have his eyes fixed on screen without blinking while i could have done wonderful blinking with those beautiful lashes. Oh and his perfectly dense hair !! Like what does he uses to get that shiny thick texture?! Oh but one thing that absolutely blows me off are his hands....i mean whoaaa, when did he get those veins popping out? All he does is gaming. When did his hands get so muscular and with such long fingers that could just swiftly touch great lengths. I instinctively reached out to touch his hands but stopped midway.
"What the hell are you doing?! You know he is just your friend right? Staph getting those shitty thoughts!!" I thought to myself. i took one last look at him and got up on my feet leaving his room into the living room. I saw his mom cooking something in kitchen.
"What are you cooking aunt?" I say as i picked up a packet of chips from the side drawer of the kitchen.
"Just some snacks for you guys. Here have a taste and let me know how is it, if the salt is alright."
She was naturally a good chef and my mom's best friend. They have been besties since college's first day. Then we were born and now we are best friends as well. She invited us over for lunch or dinner usually, so here we were in her home.
"Mhmmm, i would say the best i have ever tasted. " I chuckled as i savored her love. She loved me dearly. Oh she also has a daughter who is 6 years youngers than me. Me and her bond over our mutual love for kpop. <3 She is in school right now.
"Yeah yeah, she is the only best cook you know here. While you always pick at my cooking." My mom teased me from the living room. She was watching a movie on tv.
"Mom, you know i love your cooking as well, but i just love aunt's cooking a bit more" I laughed and sat beside her. We were all laughing. Aunt came with the fried snacks with ketchup as we started the movie marathon.
My aunt looked at her son's door and said, "Oh if only he would be as social as you were and complimented my cooking a little, i would be much more happier."
"Oh come on aunt, he loves your cooking, just not able to express it. You know he is an introvert right? He loves it all." I justified for him.
" But he doesn't gives us time. Always stuck on that laptop playing games, murmuring on the headset to his online friends while we here miss him." I could sense the sadness in her eyes.
My mom joined," Oh don't get started on the games! This girl here just started playing this game on her phone and is always stuck on it. I am so tired of it"
I huffed," MOMM! I play after doing everything chores and school work. It's my free time so i decide what to do with it."
Aunt added, "Yes YES. She is a diligent girl, she knows how to manage time. She gives you and your husband time while also playing games. Unlike my son here." I hugged her on hearing her supporting words.
My mom teased," Oho, you are so defending of my daughter. it feels like you know my daughter better."
"Oh she is my daughter as well dear. If i could arrange, i would have her as my daughter-in-law." I choked at aunt's words. Blush slowly creeping on my cheeks. To hide it i blurted, "No way! Just daughter is fine " My mom and aunt looked at each other and started laughing.
I Took a plate of snacks and started walking towards his room before they could notice my blushed face. They always joked about this!! ughhh
I entered his room and sat beside him with the snacks. "Here have some." I passed the plate to him on table. He was so engrossed in game that he didn't hear me first time. Second time i shouted the same thing, so he pulled one of ears of his headphone and looked at me. Our eyes locked for a moment. "H-here, snacks" He looked down on the plate and then as if he ignored my words, he started playing again.
I was left speechless, so i hit him on his head and left his room. One thing i can't stand here is that he ALWAYS IGNORES ME when he is playing i mean okay i get it you don't wanna be disturbed and so i rarely talk to him when he is gaming. BUT THE PROBLEM IS HE IS GAMING ALMSOT MOST OF THE DAY. Only the times when he is sitting idle, we play callofduty. That's it.
I don't know what i liked in him, but he has been my crush ever since we were 15. At that time he was very cute and talkative. He would always message me first, we would talk about our day and also say good night everyday. Things were cool. Now i miss those times. We don't talk much now. Sometimes i drag him out of house on aunt's request and sometimes on my will to walk in parks, eat street-foods. Those are the only 'dates' i can get from him. Whenever i visited his house, he would always be sitting in his room playing games, just coming out once to greet us. I always approach him first now. It's always me who messages him first now and knows about him the last. Maybe this is what they call one-sided love.
I want him to look at me too. Maybe not how i look at him, but just a glance. Give me a little time when i visit his house outside of screen on his own accord and not forced. Sometimes i just look at him long and he doesn't even get bothered. Maybe it's a blessing that he is oblivious to my feelings so can shower my eyes with his presence. I have thought of confessing but it may not be appropriate, i am scared that it would change our relationship dynamics and he would distance himself from me.
Maybe i am over thinking for worst...or maybe for good.
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Hey there good friends and darlings. This is me. This is a work of imagination of mine.....or maybe not ;D I have given this a form of journal so it feels like i am imprinting the emotions as she writes her deepest feelings on the pages.
Hope there is someone out there who would resonate with these emotions. I would like to continue this. Hope there is even one reader commenting one of there stories for me to read as well.
