Titanic (Larry Stylinson)

𝟐. 𝚃𝚛𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚍

TW: PANIC ATTACK, SUICIDE ATTEMPT, AND SMOKING DEPICTIONS

- - -

It was finally time for dinner. Louis was dressed in a beautiful black suit, while Taylor was wearing a beautiful long red dress. (the one on top ^^)

They made their way to the staircase and started to find their table. As soon as they saw their father sitting there, they also sat down.

Halfway through dinner Louis started to have a panic attack zoning out of the conversation Mark was having with someone else, while he was staring blankly at his plate, thinking 'I am seeing  my whole life as if I'd already lived it. An endless parade of parties and cotillions yachts and polo matches. Always the same narrow people, always the same mindless and endless chatter.'

He felt like he  was standing at a great precipice with no one to pull him back. No one who even  cared or even noticed.

His breathing was getting unsteady, his grip on his fork was tighter, he was seeing stars and he was using the last of his strength to get up from the chair. Taylor saw this and politely ended the conversation that she was having with Keith Hudson and Mary Perry's daughter. Katy. So she could see if her brother needed help "You okay, Louis?" She asked softly.

Louis smiled at her, she reminded him an awful lot about his mother, Johannah. Or Jay for short. Her kindness, her charisma, everything. 

Louis must have zoned out because Taylor asked him again "Are you okay, Louis?" Louis nodded, even though his eyes said a different story. Taylor sighed and whispered "I know Louis, I know. You need to calm down. Please? For me?" She asked with a pout and puppy eyes.

"Yes, I'll try." He muttered. Taylor stood up and hugged him tight. Louis smiled. She then let him go and he said "Good night everyone, I'll retire early. Have a wonderful night." He said with fake enthusiasm. Everyone muttered "Goodnight" before returning to their own conversations, which was mostly gossip.

Louis hurried to leave the room, already seeing spots and not being able to see. He entered his stateroom and felt like he couldn't breathe. He took out his bowtie but still couldn't breathe properly. He then screamed in anxiety. Throwing a vase to the floor, breaking it. Oooh, he would be in trouble later, but he didn't care any less. Then he saw a mirror, he saw his crying reflection. And then he knew what he had to do.

- - -

Louis was running, running wherever his legs could take him. He accidentally pushed aside an elderly couple, but didn't look back. He thought 'If I die, no one will care. I won't be able to marry Nick, honestly Nick can do better. But then that means that Taylor will have to marry, and pass this. But if I do this won't have to continue this bloody life. No one will mourn for me, no one will even care.' He sobbed harder as he thought that. He passed some benches, unaware of the curly lad that was peacefully smoking a cigar. Harry suddenly stood up from the bench seeing that this person was running like if there was no tomorrow.

He saw the boy climb through the railing and attempt to jump to the icy ocean. He saw him hesitating, he saw him breathing heavily. He calmly approached him and said "Don't do it."

Louis didn't look back though. He only replied rudely "Go away!" He said in between sobs. Harry sighed and said you "You don't really mean that." 

Louis rolled his eyes and replied "Yeah? Well you don't know-" He turned his head to see the handsome, hot young man he ha seen a few hours ago. He only sighed and looked back at the water longingly.

"Please don't" 

"Why? Don't presume to tell me what I will and won't do, you don't know me."

"Well, you would have done it already." He said as a matter of factly.