Koi No Yokan

I

No sé qué sentir cuando me miras

Será que yo te quiero o será tú que me olvidas?

Porque yo te amo como el verano al amanecer

Como mariposas al volar, como los pájaros al cantar

A la alegría del amanecer cuando te ven

A ti con tu sonrisa al despertar

Tu melodía llena mi corazón de tu caricia

De tu mirada hermosa sin explicar

Porque no sé si es real

Imagino que sí aunque así será?

Cuando me miras

¿Será que amas a alguien más?

Dudo sin saber quién eres

Ni de dónde vienes

Será del norte o del oeste?

Este amor que tanto anhelo

Tan joven y espontáneo

No sé como explicarte

Que viento trajo estos sentimientos

Que endulzan mi mente con tus pensamientos

Pienso en ti cuando tu no estás

Porque me siento sola cuando tu te vas

Pero pienso en ti que sentirás por mi

Corazón tan pequeño que te ama a ti

Así que te escribo estas palabras

Si algún día dudas de mi mirada hacia ti

Mi mente siempre pensara en ti

Aunque tu no estés yo siempre estaré aquí.

Another meaningless poem. The same story in every crush I ever had.

But I just can't seem to forget someone, her gaze I just couldn't erase it. I tried to forget it but writing poems just to feel better makes it worse. I am not mad just disappointed... in myself. 

I know I could've said something maybe she just wanted to be my friend. It's impossible to differentiate what's friendly and what's interest if you know what I mean. I guess I'm just bad at reading people heck I'm even worse at making friends though I've gotten better. 

But there was something different about her. I remember the first day I saw her I was so surprised there so many people at my school. Without thinking I took a quick glance at her while she walked, thankfully she didn't notice. I had been staring at people all day, it was only my first week of school. I never cached a glimpse of her afterwards until my friend invited me to a club she had joined in school. 

I didn't notice she was there the first time I went. The second or third time I had got there earlier sat where my friend and I usually sat. But my friend always came in a bit later, so most chairs were taken by the time she got there. I had hoped no one took the seat next to me but a kid took the chair to sit next to his friend. I felt so bad because I could have put my backpack there instead, to save the space for her. When she came in, she sat in front me with another girl who seemed reluctant to give up the seat the teacher was sitting in, not sure why but it was strange to say the least. 

After the students presented the project, we had to work on we could all go home but me and my friend stayed for a while. We had just met a few weeks before and we wanted to spend more time together. I'm not sure the exact reason why I was laughing at some point, but I decided to move my face closer to the front to get my friends attention. It was like those K-drama scenes where the girl smiles cutely at a guy and tilts her head but instead, they look at them from behind while their sitting in front and they look at her from the side. At the moment while I smiled and titled my head, I saw her looking at me and her eyes grew in size for some reason while she quickly looked the other way. It was cute.