Hell's Belles - Helluva Shorts (Helluva Boss SWAP AU!)

Hell's Belles

[Moxxie is at the bus stop, waiting in excitement for Sallie May to arrive. He checks the time on his phone, and it is 11:59AM. He looks out at the road and checks the time again: 12:00PM, the time that Sally May's bus is supposed to arrive. Upon seeing the time, Moxxie does a happy dance and walks from each side of the bus stop until the bus gets there seconds later.]

Moxxie: Eeeeee!

[He runs out to hug Sallie May, but he accidentally hugs a random imp who looks angry at him.]

Sallie May: [offscreen, annoyed] Psst. Mox, over here!

Moxxie: Ew! Get off of me! [pushes the imp aside and hugs Sallie May.]

Moxxie and Sallie May: Bestie!

Moxxie: You finally made it out! After I asked you like a billion times!

Sallie May: Lucky for you, a billion and one was [snaps finger] the sweet spot to visit this trash heap.

Moxxie: You ain't even been here before! Come on, I got the whole day planned out!

Sallie May: Wow, the whole day! You ain't gotta.. run off with your princess to axe some Earth fella?

Moxxie: Nah. Business has been slow lately. So, the girls say they've got it covered!

Sallie May: Damn, ain't I special! Where are we startin'?

[Sallie raises her hands above her head, and Moxxie sniffs her armpits and is disgusted]

Moxxie: We'll...uh...start with a day spa, and some shoppin'...No offense, Sal, but you smell like hog ass.

Sallie May: I do not, Prissy Mister [sways hips] probably bathes regular! [takes a moment to sniff armpit] Oh! Uh, no. No, yep. You're right that's- that is definitely hog ass.

Moxxie: Come on! Let's tear this town to shreds!

Sallie May: Yee-fuckin'-haw!

[Moxxie heads off, and Sallie grabs his bag and follows. the bag flies across the screen, transitioning to Bathory's Spa Day. Sallie May and Moxxie are laying in bathtubs filled up with bubbling mud, and holding fancy looking glasses of wine in their left hands. A worker is buffing Sallie May's right hands fingernails, while another is buffing Moxxie's left horn.]

Sallie May: So y'all, pay to soak in mud here?

Moxxie: Well, it's "special" mud. It's relaxing.

[Sallie May frowns with doubt on her face.]

[The scene cuts to the outside of the spa, and then to the store beside it, Cryptic Couture. Sallie May is inside, with a pink cowboy outfit on.]

[Moxxie jumps back and shakes his head in disapproval.]

[The scene cuts to Sallie trying on a lolita outfit.]

[Moxxie shakes his head again.]

[Sallie tries on a third outfit.]

Sallie May: How bout' this one?

[Moxxie claps his hands together with a smile.]

[The scene cuts to the arcade beside Cryptic Couture, Wacky Wally Wackford's Fun Time Emporium. Moxxie and Sallie are seen playing many different games inside. Moxxie accidentally stabs a machine with a chainsaw while playing a VR game, causing the entire arcade to light on fire. Moxxie and Sallie laugh while exiting, leaving the arcade to burn. Wally Wackford is behind them in shock. Selfies are shown of them at the arcade.]

[The scene then cuts to them at a bar, dancing. A shark demon walks to the dance floor and flirts with them. The two best friends growl at him, then beat him up. Sallie May beats the guy's head on a glass cup, breaking it. He is then thrown into the air, where Moxxie jumps up and hits him. The bartender is cleaning a cup and sees the guy get thrown behind the table next to her. She gives them a thumbs up and throws two drinks at them, as they laugh.]

Sallie May: Nice one, Mox.

[Moxxie has a brief devious look on his face as he continues laughing. The scene changes to them on a rooftop with their drinks.]

Sallie May: Ah...

Moxxie: See? Best day ever, right? I told you you'd enjoy yourself!

Sallie May: Yeah, yeah...I guess this place ain't so bad.

Moxxie: Ain't so bad? It's awesome!

Sallie May: Uh-huh...

Moxxie: One day isn't even enough. There are so many exciting things to show-

Sallie May: Heh, yeah, I mean, with so many exciting things here, it's no wonder you never make your way back home.

[Moxxie's face changes from happy to concerned]

Sallie May: SHIT! That slipped out.

Moxxie: ..What?

Sallie May: You know... the Wrath Ring, all that dirt and rust and boring nothingness. Not much of a thriving club scene down there, why is it that, right?

Moxxie: I was there at the last Harvest Moon Festival!

Sallie May: I mean, sure, for your fancy job. You showed up with that blue-blooded bird, your dick-swingin' boss, that cupcake wife of yours, and... I don't know. I couldn't really see how I'd fit into this shiny new life you built.

Moxxie: [walks over to Sallie May, tries to embrace her] Sal... [Sallie nudges her arm away] I'm sorry. Things get real crazy and busy over here, and...

Sallie May: [gets angrier] You think things didn't get busier for me back home when you decided to scooch? I've basically been running the place solo! [Moxxie looks heartbroken. Sallie May calms down.] Honestly, Mox, today was great. Better than great. It reminded me of how we used to be like this damn near every day before you left. I hate to think that it'll be even longer before we see each other again.

Moxxie: [walks to Sallie May] Yeah... I miss that too. [they rub foreheads] There's always room in my life for my bestie, Sallie May. I'm sorry I ain't been back home as much as I'd like. I'll try harder. But... you know... the girls are older now. My Ma and Daddy got plenty of extra hands at the ranch. You could come visit more often too!

Sallie May: I think I'd like that.

[They both look up into the sky as they sit on the edge of the rooftop, then Moxxie playfully punches Sallie May on the shoulder. Sallie May flips Moxxie off the edge of the rooftop, back onto the roof. She then breaks her glass and they start playfighting and laughing.]

[Later that night, in Moxxie and Millie's apartment, Millie gets home from work and notices Moxxie and Sallie May watching TV and eating popcorn. Sallie May now has a cast on her arm from play fighting with Moxxie earlier on the rooftop. Millie is happy to see the two together again. Moxxie and Sally May hold hands as they continue watching TV.]