just his(On Hold)

his desires

As soon as he left, I broke down because I didn't want him to see my tears. He does not deserve to. I have always dreamt that I would only break down in front of the love of my life, telling him all my problems, revealing all my secrets, and sharing all my wishes. But it's never going to be him, ever.

After an hour had passed, I was still in that state. I decided to change and look presentable because my hair was disheveled, my shirt was wet from tears, my bottom wear was crinkled, and my face had tear stains. But just as I got up, someone knocked on the door.

I was asked to come in. I recognized his voice—it was him. I didn't reply. Of course, I didn't want him to come in. The knocking grew louder, and his voice became more insistent, perhaps because he feared I might harm myself or do something worse. I was still standing there when he opened the door. I saw a plate in his hand, but he set it aside and hugged me like his life depended on it.

To my surprise, I didn't push him away. Instead, I actually felt safe in his arms.

I had an urge to hug him back. Was he the same man I met an hour and a half ago? Because he seemed totally different now. After a while, he broke the hug, and I felt incomplete. I literally wanted him in my arms.

''Why didn't you open the door?'' he asked.

"'Because I didn't want you to come into my room," I said without any hesitation.

'It's his house and his room. He can go anywhere he likes, you dumb,' my subconscious mind said.

"At least you could have answered. Do you even know how scared I got?" he said.

I didn't reply. I didn't know what to say.

"Okay, let's eat. I'm sure you're hungry," he said as he picked up the plate.

"I don't want to eat. I'm not hungry." But my stomach betrayed me. It growled, and I'm sure he heard it because he was sitting on the bed. I was standing near the bed when he reached for my chest. I was embarrassed.

"Oh, really? But I think it's the opposite," he said.

"I don't feel like eating," I countered.

"Peach, baby, please have it. Please?" he requested.

"Please. I don't want to have it. Get out of my room," I said, more like yelled in a low voice.

"Please have it. Baby, I'm sure you're hungry," he said back.

"Just don't show your face," I yelled loudly this time.

"I want you to have it right now. I don't want to hear any counterarguments. Just have it, Peach," he said in a calm voice. But I could sense him suppressing his anger. I knew I couldn't say anything because if I did, he would tie my hands and stuff the food in my mouth.