Good Luck, Babe!

Even If You Call It Love

Chapter Warning: 18+ Smut (Top Reader/Bottom Wanda)

---

Lifting your head off the desk at the sound of the bell dismissing class, you wiped your tired eyes and bitterly watched as every one else packed away their textbooks and pens, the smiles on their faces as they messed around with their friends, planning on how to spend their weekend whilst you simply sulked in your seat, waiting for your detention to start.

It had been a couple weeks since the conversation with Wanda and it had seemed that the universe wanted you to suffer more, teachers constantly picking you up on 'misbehaving' when you didn't even actually do anything wrong, your truck's tyre popping costing you an inconvenient amount of money, MI 13 pushing for an answer on your University application and Aunt May deciding to go on holiday with her new boyfriend, unaware that you needed her company to stop yourself from overthinking everything, just needing the older woman's comfort.

You were tired. You were so incredibly tired of everything. There was a constant weight in your chest, your mind unable to ignore the onslaught of doubts and insecurities that gnawed away you, the reminder of how your heart had been split into hundreds of pieces by the woman across the room from you ever present as you felt her concerned eyes on you, her actions contrasting her worry as she walked away slowly, her arm wrapping affectionately around Vision's, the blonde soon pecking her cheek, only further dampening your crestfallen mood. It was suffocating, the reminder that she'd never truly be yours, but that stupidly didn't stop you from seeing her, something else your exhausted mind would berate you on.

You were just so confused. You knew what you wanted, you had always known you only ever wanted her, but you knew you shouldn't want someone who was ashamed to be with you, someone who would rather neglect their issues than face them. You knew all this, but you still did it anyway, the high of being with her leading you back to meet her practically every night, the brunette worse than any drug you could be addicted to. Your body craved her, your mind, your heart, you constantly longed for her despite knowing the pain it caused you when you'd have to withdraw from her, your feelings repeatedly forced down further and further every time you planted a fake smile on your lips, trying to act as if you weren't disappointed with yourself for letting this drag on for so long.

You could feel your thoughts slipping down a negative spiral, a deep sigh escaping you as you simply longed to feel in control of something, to stop your anxiety manipulating your thoughts, but it seemed that nothing was going your way as Professor Fury walked in, the worst teacher possible for detentions entering the classroom, causing you to roll your eyes at the ceiling carelessly, feeling an annoyance bubbling inside you. Just your fucking luck.

"That'll be an extra ten minutes Y/n," the professor says without even looking up from the desk at the front of the room, your lips shutting instantly before you sighed out in irritation, unaware of how Wanda watched the interaction curiously as she waited for Vision to grab the last of his things, noticing the mask you put on slowly crumbling away.

***

Lolling your head back against your truck, you stared off into the empty car park you were currently in, the tranquil atmosphere wrapped around you a clear contrast to the racing thoughts in your mind, doubts, insecurities and ridicule tangling together, only adding to your stressed out state.

You had spent the last hour and ten minutes drowning in the battlefield that was in your head, your heart and mind constantly at war with one another with what you should do, still unable to make a decision on whether you should call this off or not as you waited for Wanda to arrive, unable to stop yourself. You were like a broken record, repeating the same conflicted thoughts over and over again, the word 'casual' ringing around in your head painfully until you had to push everything away completely at the sound of her footsteps, a small smile attempting to creep up on your lips, the usual playfulness lacking in your eyes.