Camp Faithful (Contay camp counselor au)

To Love is to Make Others Feel Pain

The night was thick and cold, the humid summer air seeping through the gaps in the wooden walls and the small crack beneath the smudge-decorated window, allowing the breeze to sneak in through it.

Taylor stood impatiently outside the bathroom door, pounding his fists against the wood in anger, growing more restless and desperate with each strike of his palm.

"You are such a fucking asshole!" he shouted loudly, the side of his hand beginning to ache and sting, his dark skin slowly turning red.

Connor didn't offer a reply to the insult. In fact, he hadn't said or replied to anything the boy had said for the past hour they had spent doing this routine: Taylor screeching and crying on the other side of the door while Connor sat slumped against the cold porcelain toilet, using the closed lid as a seat as he waited for a decent amount of time to pass, soaking up every drip of agony that permeated through the cold breeze sneaking beneath the door. If it wasn't for the small smile that crept across his face, you might even assume he couldn't hear Taylor at all through the thick wooden walls, though that was far from the truth.

In life, it seemed like there were two paths that led a person's choices: either out of love or because there was something they wished to gain. It was either selflessness or selfishness. Though in Connor's mind, these two concepts were one and the same. They overlapped in more ways than they didn't because to be loved is to gain, and to love others is to allow them to gain from you, no matter what those things might be: gifts, attention, stability, sex. Though the most a person could gain, in Connor's mind, was understanding of themselves. To love is to teach, to wake them up to the truth they clearly chose to deny. How you woke the person up was the least important aspect, however, just as long as it was done. Sometimes that means hurting people, but accepting yourself doesn't come without pain, right?

After a few more minutes, Connor finally gave in to the pounding fist on the other side of the door, mostly out of pity for the small whines that followed each thud against the wood. It creaked as it opened slowly, Connor standing in the doorway smugly.

Taylor didn't give much thought to the sight, ramming past Connor roughly to begin searching for the plaid shorts he had forgotten, already realizing he may have made the worst mistake of his life, revealing himself to this freak who clearly wouldn't show him much remorse. Taylor's mind almost completely washed from the sticky white substance in place for the endlessly bad possibilities that were eventually going to come.

"What did you do with it?" Taylor asked in an accusatory tone, bending down before collapsing onto his hands and knees to search, his body completely controlled by his desperation by this point in time. His legs were frigid and trembling as he twisted his neck to look beneath the white bowl.

"Taytay, what are you looking for?" Connor questioned, turning back around to face Taylor.

The floor was just as filthy as the rest of the cabin, the grout between the white tiles stained a pale brown, and spider webs collecting around the corners of the walls and behind the rusted metal pipes, making Taylor cringe yet again, backing away from the small brown creature living in the white strands.

"Don't. You know what," Taylor muttered, staring up at the taller boy with a heavy pout, his eyes moist and red, making Connor's blood begin to burn inside his veins.

After again not receiving a response, Taylor gave up, wandering back to the main room. Tugging at the hem of his shirt to cover his backside the best he could, the frilly pink hem squeezing around the pale bit of fat around it. Quickly, he made his way toward the bed before slinking into it, using the dusty covers to conceal the lower half of his body. His cheeks were painted a deep scarlet as he tried his best to disappear from the predator's gaze, the rough fabric scratching against his exposed skin as he sank deeper and deeper into the mattress.

Connor was quick to follow, making his way closer to Taylor as he continued to sink, hiding himself in the cocoon of blankets. Despite how smug Connor attempted to come across, he was still nothing more than a lost puppy when it came to this almost stranger, willing to follow him anywhere, whether the boy wanted to or not.

"Come on, Taytay," Connor's face curled into a larger-than-average smile, his words soaked in a sugary sweet substance, one that dripped from Connor's mouth as the words escaped it, "there's no point in being shy now."

Taylor's face burned red, his head spinning with a mix of embarrassment and anger. Though more than anything, he was disappointed. He knew how terrible of an idea this was, to wear out that frilly little piece of filth, yet he chose to do it anyway.

"Go away, Connor. Just leave me alone," Taylor said, his voice muffled by the covers that were pulled over his scarlet face.

Slowly, the black-haired boy made his way closer to the dusty bed, his steps light and clacky against the weathered wooden floors. "I really don't think that's what you want at all," he said matter-of-factly, instantly making Taylor begin to question himself. There was some part of him that couldn't deny the magnetic pull he felt toward him, no matter how disgusting and different that creature was, after spending a majority of the day with the filth-ridden freak there was at least some amount of fondness Taylor began to develop.

"You know what I think, Taytay?" Connor asked, though he didn't wait for a reply, pulling himself onto the bed along with Taylor, allowing his own legs to dangle from the edge. "You have a lot more secrets than just this, and I think it'd be a shame if anyone found out. A real—shame."

Taylor's heart pounded, forcing him to sit up. The sheets fell around his waist neatly as he stared at Connor with a mix of horror and curiosity. "What are you saying?"

"I'm not saying anything," Connor replied, his eyes sparkling with delight when he realized Taylor's attention was finally caught, his gaze growing more scared and hopeless the longer he stared back into the black orbs in front of him.

It was a lot easier to imply things than it was to say them directly. Not because it was hard for Connor to admit it. He would happily explain what exactly he meant if Taylor was too dense to understand, but it was still easier for him to get his way when he didn't explain every last detail because it meant a lot of things came down to assumption, and assumption caused uncertainty. The more uncertain Taylor was about the repercussions of whatever agreement was just made, the better because he'd likely assume the worst, though still not far beyond what Connor was willing to do to get his way.

Taylor watched in disbelief, his brain still lost as Connor ran his tongue along the line of his own chapped lips before pulling himself off the bed, taking a few lengthy steps to the tiny lamp in the middle of the two beds, standing between it and the headboard of the younger boy's bed.

"Just be a good kitty," Connor purred, leaning in closer. His hot breath traveled up the length of Taylor's neck, his opposite hand latched tightly onto the light-switch. "and everything will be fine. No one will know a thing.