I started college, I do literature, i don't enjoy it, it makes me sad, the way we profile characters, their sadness, their stories, struggles they feel, i feel as if i'm targeted, i feel like a sob story, dramatic, as if i'm not supposed to feel the things i feel, i sit by myself, i hear people whisper about me, how tragic i am, how broken i look, am i broken, who even am i, my name holds no wait, am i a person, should i feel this sad, this lonely, i can't be this i need to feel, ill force my mind.
1:37 pm, her.
It's her, her eyes, her teeth, her hair, hands, body, nose, she's her. The girl from my dreams, she's real, i feel my body quiver, my foot races tapping the ground faster and faster, i feel my heart race, i feel goose bumps, all over me. I stare in awe. i can't breathe, i need air, i can't move, i feel panic, why am i feeling panic, i feel like i'm going to vomit, the room spins, i don't know what i'm feeling, is this it, is this what my dreams have been telling me, am i going to die, this month has lead me to my death, whatever i'm feeling, My mind is telling me to calm down.
She goes to sit down, she's beautiful, she's already popular, i watch her from a distance as people understand her beauty, i don't what i feel, i hate seeing them interact with her, they don't understand her like i do, they don't understand the love we have, the soul touching experience we give each other. I can't do anything about it, i'm pathetic.
