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How to get away with MURDER💀🩸

A Guild.
HOW TO GET AWAY WITH
MURDER
(Comedy-Narrative)

This is clearly a work of fiction that is intended to bring about laughter because of how silly and accurate it may seem.The details may seem relatable because it is obviously coming from a horror lover.Any names,characters,events or examples given in this article is clearly fictional and should not be taken seriously, or maybe it should, I don't know.

© Empress Bazunu 2024
🔪

Hello everyone,if you are reading this then you must be here for any of this two reasons.One is to know how to get away with murder and the other is probably to know if I am mentally okay,yes,yes I am.Thanks for your concern.

If you have ever killed someone and you were stuck on how to dispose the body without any trace, by that,I mean how to either hide the body or get away with the murder then this practical guide is for you.This is a narrative on how to get away with that special or not so special murder.I hope you find this helpful,and with that,we shall begin.

WHAT IS MURDER?🖤

I assume we all know what murder is.For those of us who don't know,I'd love to let you know that Murder is when you are in the mood to send someone to their maker, it is the unlawful killing of a human being by another human being.Now,you might be wondering why a human being may want to kill his fellow human being,they are reasons such as;
When you find out that your boyfriend of five years has been cheating on you by going out to the movies alone without you,when you find out that your neighbor helps cut your grass,when you find out that a stranger paid for your taxi.Now,those are good enough reasons anyone may have to want to kill someone.

CONTENT
1. DISPOSING OFF THEIR BODIES WITHOUT A TRACE, WHICH INCLUDES;
1.Burying
2.Drowning
3.Acidic decomposition
4.Chopping into tiny pieces
5.Burning
6.Selling it

⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️⚠️‼️

⚠️WARNING: This  book contains explicit content, including descriptions of violence, murder, and illegal activities. Reader discretion is advised. If you're sensitive to triggering content, you may want to avoid this book.

(This is the content in getting away with that murder. P.S I am only a horror fiction writer with an imagination as unbelievable as the house Cosmo and Wanda lives in the fairly odd parents🐟🐟)

So how can one actually get away with murder? They are various ways one can do so.Lets dive into that!

First,how you'll get away with the murder depends on various factors.One of those factors is the person who you killed.

The person who you killed will determine if you'll be able to get away with that murder or not,but mind you,a word of encouragement,no one is above murder.

If you killed a random person like a stranger or probably your neighbor or even a friend,boss or co-worker,the chances of you getting away with the murder is high.But if you try to kill a person like me,the chances getting away with the murder would be low,why? Because you literally read my book titled "How To Get Away With Murder" so without my help,you wouldn't be where you are today, you are welcome.

Back to the article,so you see that the level on how you'll be able to get away with the murder depends on the person who you killed.Lets explore the various way So let's say you killed your neighbor,allow me give an illustration so you'll be able to understand properly.

Let's say once upon a time,one cool night you got into a fight with your neighbor as usual (Just like I do with mine) and you accidentally kill them. (Hope to kill you soon Jimmy.Thats the name of my neighbor who follows me here on this app and is probably reading this) and after killing Jimmy,oh sorry that was a mistake.I meant to say and after killing them,you were scared and worried and didn't know what to do.Now you can either call the ambulance (Boringgggg) and explain to them that you mistakenly killed your neighbor orrrr you can take my advice on how to have a clean getaway.After killing your neighbor for reasons best known to you,this is what you should do.If the fight happened in your house then you have a greater advantage than if it happened in his house.