We Are Monsters

Chapter 4: Quiet Here

Ethan sits in the music room alone. It's one of the few places at school that's free of other students during lunch period. He's on the floor, and his shoulders are resting against the teacher's desk backing. The lights are off, but the blinds let in enough light so he can see clearly. Despite the rooms namesake, it's quiet here. Just the way Ethan likes it.

     He takes in the silence, feeling it wash over him, sighing in relief. He reaches into his book bag and pulls out his lunch, a turkey sandwich, the only thing he knew how to make.

     If he wanted to learn to cook it would be easy, just like everything else was easy for him. Every skill Ethan tried, he would master in a matter of days. Just another thing that brought tedium to his miserable life. This curse seemingly ran in his family, given his sisters also skipped a grade. It only made him feel more like an outsider. An outcast. A monster. He runs his hands through his hair aggressively, then opens the bag in-which his sandwich lay. He took a bite.

-

After finishing his turkey sandwich, he wipes his hand on his black pants. 'Perfect' he thought. More time to be alone with himself, and let the edge roll off him in waves. There were few times when he could just let himself be, not having to keep everything buried.

He thinks about this morning, when Mia's and his hands had brushed during their collision, and when he learned of her innermost thoughts. Ever since he turned 14, He has had the ability, affliction rather, of being able to know the inner thoughts of another person through touch. While he wishes he didn't, he now knew many things about her, including her secrets. One in particular caught his attention, Anna Keller.

'This could finally be the person you confess everything to.' He thought, 'An adult who was familiar with what goes bump in the night. Maybe she'd be able to answer all the questions I have about myself. About what I am.'

But he knew it was risky, after all she may see him for the monster he really is. 'A kind girl like Mia must've been raised by someone kind.' He continued 'and she may not like what I am, or what I've done. What I did.' His thoughts race, his leg bounces with growing speeds. 'I still can't believe I did that. Sure he had his faults, but I loved him, he was my dad and the man who raised us....' he grabs at his hair with tight fingers, quickly trying to shoo away his racing thoughts.

'I can't let that happen again'. Slowly, he felt something begin to bubble up from deep within himself. It was buried deep but always there just waiting in the wing, his Darkness. The darkness that crept through his bones, eating away at his soul. He lowers his hands to his legs, wiping his damp palms on his pants.

     The Darkness began to scream for a way out. He clenches his teeth and rests his head against the desk, dark, blond curls falling behind him. His fingers tingled, and from the tips grew large black claws. He raised them to eye level, examining the new form with disgust. A singular tear dropped from each eye, and he let out a low, guttural roar. He knew he could never hide from the Darkness, but at least here in the silence he could let it out. Let out the Darkness before it took him over, and he was the one screaming to be let out.

-

Ethan knew what he needed to do, but it didn't make the task any less daunting. He stood in front of Ms. Keller's classroom door. Most of the students had left on the bus by now, but the hallways were still filled. Club members and athletes hoping to make a spot on whatever teams they were trying out for littered the school.

     The walk home would be about 2 mile, but he could handle that, more time for himself. Maybe he'd walk around the woods, visit his old house.

    As he was about to step towards the classroom, someone comes rushing up behind him. Nearly bumping into Ethan. He turns around to look over at the student, and was met with piercing blue eyes staring at him. The boy looked scared, like he had seen a ghost, or a monster right in the eyes. Ethan quickly looked back at his reflection in the small window of the classroom door, checking to make sure the student did not actually see a monster. But to his surprise the reflection staring back at him was pure Ethan, no monster in sight. He swiftly brushed off the encounter, perhaps the boy had seen a ghost.

He reached out his clenched fist and softly knocked on the wooden oak door.