Beyond The Checkered Flag

002- (Till Death Do Us Part, My Love)

FORMULA 2 DRIVER LUCA ROSSI :
everything we know so far:

Luca Rossi hasn't been seen out of the hospital since his life threatening crash in São Paulo. Many of our journalists have attempted to find out the answer to the question, will he recover?

Just a few weeks ago a crash with his girlfriend Estella Albani, a 2 lap long wheel to wheel fight, caused by the two competitive drivers fighting for the first place spot, ended in catastrophe when their wheels collided for a split second, sending Luca Rossi's turning car, airborne. He hurtled through the air, barrelling straight into the metal barriers around the track.

Fans were silenced as his car landed at a certain angle where his cockpit landed directly on the barrier. A crash like that is suspected to result in a serious case of brain damage as he was knocked unconscious on impact.

We may not have the answer to his specific state of health, but we have spotted Estella Albani visit the hospital he is in, serval times every day. This can give us a good indication that he is alive.

We cannot imagine how Estella must be feeling. We can guess that she must blame herself for the crash, as we know her close relationship with Luca. They just recently shared their 2 year anniversary, which seems like a small time for how inseparable they are, but even a close relationship like theirs can be forgotten when the competitive world of racing comes in.

And one more thing we know is that Lucas parents have been flown in from their home in Italy and haven't been spotted out of the hotel, so we can make a accurate guess that they have not left the hospital as of yet.

One final thing to mention is the rumours about Estella's future in the sport, there are photos of her and Bruno Famin after her race where she was crowned Formula 2 champion last weekend. Many speculate that a seat in formula one was set to be given to her Boyfriend Luca Rossi, meaning Estella has not only taken the championship away, but also a future as the best of the best in formula one. "Was is planned?" Many asked, that is a question we sadly cannot answer yet.

           —ESTELLA—

A summer is always more enjoyable when you know after it ends, the most exciting thing of your life will start.

Or at least that's what most would say.
I visited the hospital again today. I can't seem to leave his side. He's been in a coma for at least 3 weeks now, a time where I should be happy and all I can think about is the love of my life, fighting for his.

I'm being eaten alive by guilt and fear. So many people blame me for what happened to him, and so do I. If I would have bailed faster, not gone wheel to wheel on that corner, he would still be here. It's a fact I can't live with. I know he is alive, I keep listening to his heart beat just to remind myself, to convince myself he is ok. But he isn't ok. I can't stand to see him in this state. There are more things attached to him than I can count, they are gripping on to the possibility that he might one day wake up.

I don't know what I would do if he doesn't.

Contradicting to what other people may believe, I didn't do anything purposefully, how could I. He will always be the love of my life, he has my whole entire heart, I will never be able to give it to anyone else. I know if he dies, I won't recover. I still stay up at night, wishing it was me, wishing I could go back or at least swap places with him. He's the sun that shines on my life, without him it's empty and meaningless.

Thoughts swirl in a loop round my head as I sit in the waiting room. I haven't slept in days, every time I close my eyes I just see his car spinning... spinning.

I can't make it stop.

I twirl the promise ring round my finger again, trying to distract myself. I read the words engraved on it again.

'Till death do us part, my love'

"Visitors are welcome in now." The nurse of this sector walks in. I stand up and walk as fast as I can without looking crazy, finding his door. As I do, I stop outside and take a big deep breath before pushing down the cold metal of the door handle and applying force to open the heavy door.

"Valentine, Giovani." I greet Luca's parents who haven't left the room in weeks. They sleep in the chairs and don't leave his side. I wish I could do that too, but I just can't. I can't manage to spend longer than an hour or 2 with him without breaking down. If I stayed here non stop, I would loose my sanity.

"Oh darling." Valentine sighs lightly as she pulls me into a tight hug. She runs her fingers through my hair, like I'm the foothold, reminding her there is a world outside this hospital room.

"How is he?" My voice is quiet, but still manages to fill the small silent room.

"Sadly nothing has changed sweetheart." Valentine allows me to slowly move towards his bed. His face is frozen in an expression which just reminds me of pain, the beep of his heartbeat monitor, and the noise of his oxygen machine mix to create a form of white noise which incases the otherwise silent room. I wonder what he sees and feels right now. Is he in a state of constant pain or is it just dark nothing?

"So, we heard about your formula one news Stella! That's amazing we are so happy for you." Lucas dad breaks my train of thought. I see the hurt in his eyes, many think the seat was always meant to be Lucas. Well I agree with that, he was an incredibile driver.

"Giovani... we don't have to talk about that if you don't want to. I know it must hurt." He answered with an encouraging smile and a nod.
"You deserve it, you know me and val will cheer you on the whole way." I can feel the pain hidden under his answer.
"Thank you guys" Valentine nods in response.

"It means you can't visit him as often right?" My gaze drops to the floor, it's a fact I've tried not to think about. Formula one is big so I will have barely any time to fly back and visit Luca. It pains me to know that, but I can't put my future aside for him.

"Yeah I guess... I will try as much as I can of course" the room falls to silence once again. Luca's shallow breaths create a steady rhythm that I subconsciously join along with. I watch Valentine slowly close her eyes, she must be exhausted. My gaze falls to him again, it makes my heart physically hurt, I grip my chest rubbing my palm on the skin over my heart, trying to soothe the heartache. The room feels like it's shrinking. Fuck I can't do this anymore, I have to leave.
I stand up, the chair squeaking slightly breaking the silence. I whisper a quick apology before allowing my feet to rush my out of the room.

I try not to slam the door as my back reached the wall and I slide down. My mouth creates an O as I force out a large breath of air.
"Hey, sorry, excuse me miss are you alright?" I rise my gaze to meet that of a random man, I cannot make out who he is through my blurry, tear filled eyes.
"Y-yes, sorry I just needed some space." I manage to splutter out.
His arm reaches out to me, offering to help me up. I take it.
"I understand how you are feeling, do you need a hug?" His rough voice asks.
"Thank you..." as his arms wrap around me I can't help but cry more, he reminds me of Luca. I'm suddenly conscious of how much of a mess I must look so I bury my face into his neck to hide it.
"Cha, we need to go the flight is soon." A woman speaks and the man pulls away.
"I hope your situation gets better soon." Were his last words as he squeezed me tighter for a second and walks away.