Dominant Omega | Chanlix| Minsung

Go down the path

-I messed up, father, messed up a lot.

-Tell me.

I sobbed as he river of emotions that was inside of me just ran outside hitting the cheeks and lower.

-I did something very bad.

I said as I felt the older man coming to me even closer as he kneeled down hugging me.

-Did u work for my biological son, did u involve with that family?

-Yes, I did.

-Why to work for such bad people?

-I wanted a revenge but I had no idea how shocked I was to discover that he is different father, he is good.

-What are u talking about?

The older man pulled my face by the chin asking questions he deserved to know.

-It's just hard to explain, I think u were mistaken father, the truth is different.

His hand held me as I opened the envelope trying to read it through the swollen red eyes.

"Dear father,

I had no idea where are u and I can't imagine how close u were.

I don't know why u son appeared on my porch asking for job, I don't know anything what happened to you or my mother, as she never explained herself.

I have no-one if you ever wondered. I was living with no understanding long years and one day just stopped wondering about this all thing.

If you wanted to know, mother left around 7 years ago running from my step-father and later I haven't heard about her, I guess since also, don't know my mother. My sister left 4 years ago to travel, so I am living alone without anyone.

Grandparents died long time ago. The stepfather is the only person around me, how cruel it wouldn't be; it is like this.

I am greatly sorry for the damage my mother brought to you and perhaps my grandparents.

I hope this compensation will help you to live comfortably with no need for something, u can contact this person below to ask for more, it's alright.

I never intended to explain myself to other people. I guess u were living all these years blindly following the instincts of nothing more but a lie, the same as me.

I hope Chan is better son than me.

Lee Felix."

It was heart breaking to read those words as I imagined him saying them in life. As it was the first time I saw my father crying. His hands were in the airs as I saw the pain he carried.

-Chan, son, tell me, that was that handsome young man in white hair and dark eyes, right?

He remembered him as Felix came over some time ago.

-Yes father.

I said as my head fell on my knees, I was so wrong, I hurt him even more.

-He is so handsome. My son. I had no idea the hell he went though and I was so blind what a shame on me.

I felt his words touching and breaking my skin.

It was the hot boiling water touching me right now as I made so many mistakes. I was lost again. 

Chan's POV

It was all due to voices in my head, they just followed me all the time asking for a revenge and firstly I though it was some kind of a silly joke but then it turned bad, the voice made me do really bad things, it irritated me and agitated the monster inside.

The trembling hands and the red, swollen eyes were a part of my life until when I got into gardening together with the diagnosis and the treatment it was under the control and the help of black soil I was recovering back.

I was getting better for once. The these stories of my father telling me about his son and how they treated him like trash throwing out of the house when Felix's mom was pregnant, it was a new nightmare for me and I just blindly followed the instinct of the revenge but it all didn't fit at all. It felt like I was dog with no eyes.

I watched him being so professional and sincere and there was no dot of angriness or rudeness inside of that pretty omega, he was much more pure than those people around him, his life was covered with mud and he was walking like a clean angel inside of the paddles.

I messed it up and created for myself a great hole in my heart, I fell for him perhaps, he was the only person who made me feel so full. He touches and smile, the way he kissed me was so pure, but what I did was unacceptable and I guess I deserve it all, I will take this lesson and move on. I have to.

I wiped the rest of the broken thoughts helping my father to walk to the house as he rested after I gave him pills.

I fell on the bench by the house looking at the cat going up to me, it touched my leg purring to me as he jumped on me cuddling, I touched it patting lightly.

-I fucked it all up.

I whispered calmly watching into the garden that was the only thing holding me straight right now.

He left to the US, I heard from the Hwang who met me in the city being sympathetic and nice, he was off to the other country and out of my reach, I couldn't even say anything at all. I lost this fucking game.

P.S. The concerts in Europe were insane! Loved it. I wasn't attending, but i saw clips. Insane how free they feel in Europe! 

I have been on tour in mountains and damaged my knee cup... talk about luck to me.

Next one on 20th.