𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐌𝐎𝐊𝐄, chris sturniolo !

002 - friday nights.

💌. ! CHAPTER 002 •⟫ °🫀

" friday nights."

( irl & imessages )

july 19th, 2024:

i've healed slowly. it's taken a while but it happened. i miss them so much, but i have to move on sooner or later. at this moment in time, i think about minnesota and how i drowned myself in greif for months. that's not me anymore. i'm a new person... (sorta). ayden likes to call me often, but i purposely ignore his calls and voicemails. occasionally, i'll answer his messages or snaps, but i really can't stick to commitment right now. i love him as a close friend but seriously nothing more. one day i'll find the right one for me. but not now. and certainly not him.

it's a hot summer day in july and i'm on the verge of calling out from work. but i won't. i haven't missed a single day of work. ever. and i've never called out either. it's not financial problems that cause me to work, it's the ambition that my parents gave me from when i was a little girl. and i have to keep that in me, no excuses. i actually have a good feeling about tonight. something is in the air and it feels... anticipating maybe? but at the same time, working at a hospital can feel like that.

i work my first 8 hour shift tonight, usually i work 12's. it feels good to get a mini break or even time off but it also leaves my mind to wander off to places that i like to ignore. i like this new hospital that i work at and wouldn't trade it for anything. i love most of my coworkers and all of my patients to death. that's another reason why i couldn't be in love right now, i can't leave people to die for love. for me to fall in love, it would have to be crucial... and possible.

imessages: 

new message from ayden 🙄

ayden 🙄

hey hey 

addy 💜

hi

ayden 🙄

working again tonight?

addy 💜

yup i am :))

ayden 🙄

ooh some smiley faces?

nice

addy 💜