❛ 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒏𝒆 ❜

16

y/n lay in bed with howl, her head resting on the spare pillow beside his. their faces were just inches away from each other, close enough that she could feel the warmth of his breath against her skin. howl had tried to go back to sleep, his eyes fluttering closed as exhaustion began to claim him. y/n watched him quietly, her gaze soft as she took in the peaceful expression on his face. his chest rose and fell slowly, his breaths soft and gentle.

the sounds of his breathing were almost hypnotic, a steady cadence that might have lulled her to sleep if her mind wasn't so restless. one of howl's hands had found its way to her hip, his thumb subconsciously rubbing small circles against her skin. the touch was soothing, and y/n felt a strange mix of comfort and guilt at the same time.

she tried, again and again, to close her eyes and let sleep take her, but every time she drifted close, the gnawing guilt pulled her back into wakefulness. her thoughts kept circling back to the events of the day, to the way howl had spiraled into despair after his hair had changed color. it had seemed such a trivial thing, especially to someone like howl who probably could whip up a simple hair color-changing spell as opposed to relying on potions that he couldn't even differentiate from to fix his oh-so terrible situation. 'what a childish man...' y/n thought to herself, sighing softly whilst being careful not to disturb howl, or his beauty sleep.

she couldn't shake the feeling that she had done something wrong, that she had somehow failed him. she felt a pang of guilt every time she thought about how he had reacted, the way his eyes had filled with despair and anger.

she wanted to make it up to him, to find a way to fix what she had done, but she wasn't sure how, and just like that, her eyes drifted down to watch as howl's chest continued to rise and fall. she could feel the warmth of his body so close to hers, the gentle weight of his hand on her hip grounding her in the moment. she knew he wasn't upset with her, not really. he had forgiven her as soon as he had calmed down, but the memory of his despair haunted her. not only that, but calcifer almost got submerged under the goo—what if something were to happen to him? her stomach churned at the thought of hurting the demon, or worse.

y/n shifted slightly, careful not to wake him as she moved. she reached out with her free hand, brushing a stray lock of dark hair away from his face. howl stirred slightly but didn't wake, his thumb still rubbing soothing circles against her hip. the small gesture of affection made her heart ache. "i'm sorry, howl," she whispered, her voice barely audible, as if afraid to disturb the quiet intimacy of the moment. she wasn't even sure if she wanted him to hear her apology or if she was simply trying to ease her own conscience.

a few moments passed in silence, and then her stomach gave a small, embarrassing gurgle. y/n bit her lip, hoping it hadn't woken him. but then an idea began to form in her mind, a way to make it up to him. howl had done so much for her, from saving her to offering her a place in his world. maybe she could return the favor, even in a small way.

cooking. it wasn't much, but it was something.

determined, y/n tried to slip out of the bed without disturbing him. but as she began to move, howl let out a low, groaning sound, and before she could react, he wrapped his arm fully around her waist, pulling her closer to him. he nuzzled into her neck, his breath warm against her skin, and y/n felt her entire body tense in surprise. her heart pounded in her chest, and her face flushed a deep shade of red. she could feel the heat radiating from her cheeks as howl continued to nestle against her, still lost in his dreams.

she froze, not daring to move, hoping that he wouldn't wake up. but his breathing remained steady, his grip around her loosening slightly. it took a few long moments for her to finally relax, realizing he was still asleep. once she was sure he was in deep slumber again, y/n carefully extricated herself from his hold, moving with the utmost caution. she slipped out of bed, her heart still racing from the unexpected closeness. "i'll be right back," she whispered, glancing back at the wizard one last time, and with that, she made her way downstairs.